Awesome tune dude, love all the synth lines, the vocal's wicked and the bass is loverly.
The only think I would change, and I think would make the difference between it working on the dancefloor or not, is just to make the snares a bit more punchy. Get some compression on them and turn down the reverb cos they are not really driving the track and if people are gonna go nuts on the dancefloor thats what they need. Also just a little more of a smack in the face drop after the breakdown would go a long way - might just be a tiny silence after 'take this' before the drop and a big loud noise like a nice crash cymbal or something on the first beat just to emphasise it a bit more. Don't get me wrong, the track is great as it stands which is why I have given it a 10 but this is just a DJ perspective on it, I think those tweaks could make it a real good club track.