Hmmm
Alright, where to start.
Well, it sounds recorded, and with that being said, there were some clipping issues. I've heard some missed beats, like a millisecond too late. After the intro, it became repetitive. Although that beat sounded great, it shouldn't be repeated like 12 times.
The intro was awesome. I think it would have sounded great if you broke up the verse (I'ma call it that after the intro) was broken down with the beginning beat. Give it a little change up.
But don't get discouraged, it sounded relatively good for a recording, not like the other crap I heard on here.
Put a little more work into it, and I'm sure it will sound awesome.
Rock on \m/.