So you remember Big O at all? It's an anime where Dorthy, an android and Roger Smith, a negotiator of sorts, must solve the worlds problems etc. She's got an affinity for piano though. The only catch is, she's a robot so though the piece is amazing when she plays it it feels like it's missing something.
So what does all that mean? Your piece is complex. It dances but where it should be light, where it should breathe, where it should slow down, it cannot. Fire Dorthy. lol.
Being that I have a natural ear for music as I do play and compose myself I can see what you're trying to convey. The movements are relevant, the progression is there, but breathing needs to occur. Sometimes it's okay to let something hang over. Allow for a bit of silence during the song. It can build as much anticipation as a run does.
Personally, I do like the piece, but I would love for you to play it, or some one to actually play it on the piano. Take the sheet music and add in tempo changes, dynamics, write out the emotions the movements that you were trying to convey and give it to a pianist and see what happens. I would love to hear someone play this. The emotions they would infuse in it would surely bring this up to a ten.
Stuck with just finale so I know how ya feel. lol