This loop isn't horrible or random, but there certainly is a lot of work that could be done. Don't worry, I'm not going to bash you and say, "5/10!!! >:-(". I'll at least give some reasoning and advice.
Firstly is the bass line. The third chord in the progression sounds very clashing and dissonant. Try raising it up a half step and fitting the melody accordingly. The reason it sounds clashy is because the note is a half step up from the first notes of the scale, called the tonic. This is not part of a normal major or minor scale, and sounds out of place. If you raise it up a half-step, however, (The next immediate note up, which is an "F-sharp" in this case) it would fall naturally into the scale and sound more comfortable. It is okay to use an occasional note outside of the songs scale once you know what you are doing and have some experience. Right now, though, I would not recommend it. Try to learn a little music theory, first, which will help tremendously.
Secondly is the drum beat. It isn't random, but suffers from over-simplicity and odd patterns. Right now you have two eighth note bass drum beats followed by two cymbal beats. Try two bass drum beats, a snare or cymbal beat, and a rest. It will kind of sound like the "We will rock you" riff. xD
The melody is okay but a little hard to follow. At :08 seconds, you have the drums, bass guitar, and lead all hitting every beat (One-and-Two-and...etc). You don't need to have every instrument hitting at the same time doing the same thing. It can became a bit monotonous. Then, you have a rhythym with 16th notes in the melody later on which sounds a bit dissorienting. I suggest you slow down a bit and see if your melody is singable and easy to remember. Without listening to this, could you easily hum the complete melody? It doesn't have to be complicated. Simple can go a long way IF you do it effectively.
That, and this is a short loop. I realize it is just a loop, but trying making something a bit longer with more variety. I know my advice is long and perhaps a bit hard to swallow for the avarage layman. Try learning a bit of music theory if you have some time on your hands. There are books and tons of free websites out there to help you. Google is your friend. :P
Hope that helps to some extent!
Well, you don't really need to explain everything to me if you want to review again, or assume that I don't know what i'm doing. I'm currently majoring in music :D
The only reason why it sounds like i'm inexperienced is because i'm inexperienced at the program i'm using, plus I don't have a microphone on my computer so I can't record ACTUAL music.
But i'm probably going to install FLS, which seems to be a bit better of a program...
I like this style.
I'm diggin this.
thank you :D