Ok...

Well, you asked for honest critique, so here goes. To me this song really feels like it is missing something. This was a major problem that I had to deal with when I started out writing music. There needs to be more in the background to make the song sound "full" and not empty. In most music there is A LOT of noise going on in the background that you don't really notice unless your listening for it. It could be something as simple as just adding long chords, but there needs to be something to make the music feel less empty.

Also, you have a repeating part throughout the entire song, and to me it feels like it's too noticeable. What you are adding/changing underneath the repeating part sounds a lot more interesting, and you should try to bring that to the foreground and have the repeating part fade into the background.

It's not bad for a first submission. Keep writing music and I'm sure you'll make progress!