I'll give it a higher vote when you master the track.
That is, make sure the dB level in the master mix is below 0. Do this by adjusting individual volume levels, and remove the fruity limiter if you have one on. PM EQ as well. Then you can add them back on after it's properly mastered. Then it'll sound more professional.
Also, the last note in your 8 bar phrase is wrong(2:50 as an example). Please change it, or just change the chord progression to something more smoothing. It's kinda akward. Also, the sudden ending is wierd.
Just things to work on. Keep it up, and don't give up.
Also, mess with the bass from (2:35 to 2:40). It's off there. Something's outta tune.