it'll only be compared unfavourably to the origin
There's a lot of sections where you sorta break the rhythm. On the other hand, the rhythmic sections (with repeated chords) seem kinda stilted - as if you're using great effort to do all this and you're not able to get into a proper flow.
There are some great bits of guitar-work, but it's interspersed by too many 'uncomfortable' bits and it'll only be compared unfavourably to the original.
Why not compose an original piece for your next effort, or pick a simpler tune and tweak it a bit?