Well, experiments are the only way to start.
The snare seems to overpower slightly, but I think it's essential to have that. The high hat strike at the end seems to ruin the run, but I feel like SOMETHING has to be there after those sixteenth notes. I'm loving your pieces. The piano part could play out a bit more, I think, while backing off the snare just a hair. Upon the chance you may wish to complete it, it's lacking some real support to that main power.
Please contact me if you would like to use this in a project. We can discuss the details.