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Goretober 30 - Knife


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4.44 / 5.00

Oct 31, 2016 | 2:08 PM EDT
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500 x 500 px
791 kb

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Author Comments

It's raining knifes.



Rated 5 / 5 stars

This is "knife"

ZeTrystan responds:

Knife of you to say that!


Rated 5 / 5 stars

this is now my favourite thing.

ZeTrystan responds:

Happy you like it! :D


Rated 5 / 5 stars

It was a normal day. I've just gone out of my job, boss made me do overtime, i've got out too late and lost the bus, now i have to go home on foot. The broadcast was right today, it was rainy so luckily i brought with me my trusty raincoat, boots and umbrella combo.

"Can you do overtime?"- They say - "Remember that promotion."- They say. Sigh i shouldn't let money think for me. UGH great now the rain is getting harder i better get there faster, 5 miles won't cover themselves alone... Huh, since when was there a hole in my umbrella? Shit now i have to go home with water driping on my head, great. On heinsight actually i should've bought a new umbrella, there are alot of holes on it.

WELP, now it started raining hail, not like my day coulde've gone any worse. And they're making the holes bigger, shit. Running in the rain with boots whilst avoinding falling is harder than you'd think. But there is a silver lining: If i'm lucky i will get sick and won't have to work tomorrow... nah screw it this rain is enough proof for it i'm gonna call in sick tomorrow regardles of my health, that'll teach my boss... no it won't he won't know that i wasn't sick...

AHH FUCK. A fucking sharp hail shard just gutted itself on my arm, is this even possible? I stopped at the nearest shop and made a torniquette using some shitty bozze, a rag i bought and some toilet paper that i also bought, be prepared boy/girl scouts (I doubt this would actually work irl and i'm not responsible if you get an infection for using public bathroom toilet paper).

OUCH OUCH OUCH!!!!! MORE SHARDS ARE RAINING FROM THE SKY I'M ALMOST AT HOME, MY UBRELLA IS USELESS. At least they only cut me they didn't insert themselves onto my arm. Just a few more meters.

I'M HOME, FINALLY!! I'm now in my cozy room i pet my cat, give it food and prepare my dinner... Woah... that's why i've been getting cut left and right... Looks like it wasn't hail... i was knives... literally knives... had i just looked up or payed attention at the shard that hit my arm and i would've known what happened... Actually scratch that if i had looked up i probably would've gotten a knife to the eye... I don't know what or who caused it but i hopeit never happens again.

AN/ Sorry for the delay i just wasn't feeling up to it this week. But silverlining: I've thought of a alternate ending and it wasn't shittly like the last one.

(Alternate ending)

As i finished questioning what happened i turned on the news and quickly got my questions answered. "This night scientists tried to make the zeppelin not a crappy thing and tried to fly one. There have been 500 confirmed people attending to this horrible idea and the result of this revival was the same as the last one, but this time worse. Many cuttlery have been launched into the air creating quite literally a knife rain. OH THE HUMANITY!!" Moral of this day: People are idiots...

ZeTrystan responds:

That a great moral. I'll re-use it in many situations, I think.

Also, can he call sick from knife sickness? Mmmh. I'm sure his boss won't buy it.

And I hope you're feeling better as well!


Rated 5 / 5 stars

I'd rather axe a question.

ZeTrystan responds:

Axe-tempest are rarer.


Rated 5 / 5 stars

It's judgement day and God says "Prepare to be chopped".

ZeTrystan responds:

Good thing he had his religious umbrella.