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Author Comments

Not too long ago, I was at the grocery store buying food and shit. I ended up in the aisle with the soda and bottled water and stuff, and I notice this short-ass woman trying her best to reach the off-brand Diet Dr. Cola bullshit they have on the top shelf (it was on sale, I guess). This lady was struggling pretty hard, even started climbing on the shelves and shit when I just reached up and grabbed it, passed it to her and gave her a wink. She thanked me, and I proceeded to say "No problem, God blessed ME with height!"

What I said was unintentionally fucked up. "I'm tall, you aren't. I can reach products that you can't - I guess God fucked you on that one, huh?" I mean, it was supposed to be an innocent know how sometimes you start saying something that you slowly start to regret as you progress through the sentence, and about halfway through it gets a little too late to stop, so you have to finish what you were saying and sound like a complete jackass? Man, I'm far too familiar with the flavor of my foot. Or for you UK guys, the flavour of my foout.

Actually, I think it was the very same day that I was in the cereal aisle, comparing different boxes of breakfast cereals and trying to decide what to pick up. Some other, older lady was standing there when I settled on Raisin Bran - I guess I felt like making someone laugh, so I held up the box like a Raisin Bran spokesperson and said "MMMM! 2 scoops of raisins in every box!" then smacked my lips.

That was kinda awkward. She just kinda looked at me with squinty, dagger eyes and said some shit like "uh huh", then grabbed some flavorless oat cluster shit for old fucks and just walked away. It's like, hey lady - I just went out of my way to drop 2 scoops of humor into your life, the least you could do is maybe crack a smile or...ANYTHING. Don't cunt out on me and walk away like I'm some piece of shit who isn't worth your precious fucking time.

Dunno. Maybe she just had a bad morning. Maybe she had lady pains. Maybe her baby died inside her just the month before because she tried to procreate far too late in life.

Maybe some people are just cunts.


kinda hot and kinda demented

The girl is hot and has a great body. But the rape and monster is kinda disturbing. The weirdness alone give it a good rating. But the rant about short people and cereal was hilarious. Good job on both.

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Your write up gave me a laugh and yeah people are like that. I have had security called on me when i went to a doctor appointment at a new place. I walked in and said "Good afternoon madam, my name is Mr. "name goes here" (extended my hand to shake hers) and i am Dr. "name goes here" three o clock appointment. she stares at me for a min with fear/shock and tells me "JUST GO SIT OVER THERE PLEASE!!!" . i said ok thinking eveything is fine. 5 mins later secruity escourts me out for being aggressive towards her.

WTF i mean there are some Emotional cripples out there. This women has no place working anywhere around people. How strange is it to say hi, nice day isnt it? im so and so and its a pleasure to meet you. shake hands. What type of world do we live in where friendliness is seen as being a dangerous threat to human life or humor as being seen as wrong? fk em i say and be waht you are.

strange to be talking about whats strange in the world when this post is on the page with a chick being raped by some thing with rape it has a card.

it was a knee doctor btw.

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What does the story have to do with the picture? Even if it is an awesome story. So great story, great picture. Sense:??? Doesn't matter anyway I guess. Oh Well.


thats one damn good picture...
foout? not all british are from newcastle...

I would have laughed.

The story was worth it. I mean, the girl is okay, but girl to girl, I wouldnt rape her, it would end badly(does rape ever end not badly?). Nice work though!

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Credits & Info

4.13 / 5.00

Jul 7, 2009 | 1:54 AM EDT
File Info
720 x 960 px
536.7 kb

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