It looks like you did this in SAI, am I correct? Your linework looks decent, but it's really lumpy - try adding a pressure stabilizer and see if it helps. Body looks pretty good, but her right (our left) arm looks a bit wonky. Use a mirror as reference and look at how your own arm would look in that position. Shading is in the right direction, but you're going a little too much with the whites, plus straight up white doesn't really look good. Try to keep the color of the thing you're tinting and shading.
You're headed in the right direction, keep going.