I'm gonna say, that this is one of the most violent works I've made. (maybe the most violent)
But in part, it's something that happened to me yesterday, whlist playing Sonic Lost World: I felt excitement when going through the stages, but things started to get worse, in Stage 2 of Sky Road; for how much I tried, it was very hard for me to stop it. After a final failure, I raged so bad, and forcefully quit the game. Yet the massive life loss was also a thing, since, every few Rings, an attack happened, and I died. After noticing about the wounds, I decided to do this, yet the other intention was, the fact that I've also been having too much real-life problems.
School is close to conclusion, but, the few cases where I raged were worse than other times, and were more harmful. I got more into focus, due to me running out of good drawing ideas, and I STILL can't stop feeling the anger and the sadness. It is like I try to act more seriously, and going too far with losing sense of humor and chances of feeling fun while playing my favorite apps. And this is why I'm also getting into darker drawings. Because it's the only thing I can have in mind, and because of all my problems, described above.
Yet, I'm also scarred by what people have been doing with me; Ignoring me, raging at me because of me sharing their images, raging because of me RAGING, unfollowing me because they'd know that I will explode soon... the list is endless.
There are so many challenges in the future, but it's impossible for me to get over them. I don't know what to do, and I don't know why this is happening to me. Instead of ecstasy, I've got depression. Instead of hope, I've got anger. Instead of staying calm, I panic at every moment, and suffer stress to puke for (literally). Instead of being just a lone person, I've got more into anti-social behavior, making me be the monster of the class. Instead of being hyperactive and being of a darwinist, I appear to be silent and more of a creationist. And not even my parents can help me with my dark thoughts. I just feel like I must study alone in school. Yet it's impossible to find a private school, and mostly, because of me about to conclude Secondary. I'm less of a Choonie, and more of a Nightmare.
My darker thoughts are getting over my bright-sided experiences, and I have more problems than ever. Even if it's not because of me playing too much Plague Inc. I'm now getting failures on everything I do, and more successes in school, but because I try to not to scream when a teacher is present, and because, they saying that my anger issues are controlled, but they're still active, but asleep.
There's absolutely nothing to do; The damage is done, and there will still be hemorrhagic emotion attacks.
I CAN'T KEEP ON WITH THE SITUATION! I NEED SOME TREMENDOUS HELP!! YOU KNOW WHAT WILL I DO WHEN NOTHING DARES TO HELP ME!!
Soak Speed: me
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