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The Shadows of Chaos

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Author Comments

A story that i wrote in school, i liked it, so its being turned into a flash.

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Meh...

Wasn't the greatest thing ever made, but it looks like your series has promise, and I'll check it out.

Short

It was short but set up the story well.Good job.

Wow...a trailer.

If I weren't in such a good mood, I'd thrash the movie. Oh wait..it isn't a movie.

It looks like it Might be cool

The Plot looks a bit questionable but if you pull it off I think it will be a good movie.

Hmmm....looks interesting

I must say, you've piqued my interest in your story. The idea is unique, in a way. Great authors have written books about societies with no emotion or individuality, but not in a way like this. I'm looking forward to seeing the story unfold.

I really only have a few comments:
First, the music in the beginning was a little loud and discordant. I understand you wanted to create the idea of chaos, but try it with a little less volume. Also might wanna make a few more explosions on the planet to show its destruction; one little bubble in the northeastern hemisphere doesn't really convey much.
Second, your rocket was a little uninventive. This is very cosmetic and trivial, but I think it'd be cool if it were a little more snazzy. Just an opinion.

Third, and biggest: you shouldn't submit previews. If you want, make it more like a prologue. Add a little more of your story to it, take out the "coming soon," and title it as a chapter prologue. It sounds really simple and stupid, but change things like that and people won't get mad at it. Well...at least I dont THINK they will.

Anywho, I'm looking forward to your story! Your graphics and idea seem very solid; stick with 'em!

Credits & Info

Views
2,549
Faves:
1
Votes
11
Score
2.85 / 5.00

Uploaded
May 4, 2003
8:04 PM EDT