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I animated a picture from NarutoPIXXX.com . . .
I'm new to this, so constructive criticism is appreciated.
If you would like to make a request, or possibly collaborate please feel free to send me a message.
Bout a weeks worth of work on and off. Hope to get better over time.
It'd be better if there was some audio.
Needs more animation and a third option instead of two.
I think a solid 3-stars is about right... And I'm going to offer a few thoughts in hopes to help.
First, picking this work apart just a bit to get to the fine points.
In #1, the guy is doing some reasonable motion, himself. The girl is also sliding a bit, and I think the real focus that loses the sense of penetration is the vein on the penis, itself. The shortest, simplest rebuild to this is to put the end-point frame with the vein specifically obscured or partially obscured inside her, the way it ends up in #2... That will finish "selling" the action to the viewer...
In #2, you've got good penetration action, but the guy's lost motions in his hips (in lieu of higher reps?) and the result seems to be that only the genitals are doing much of the motion... It's definitely interesting, bringing almost a hint of "tentacle action" to the thing, but if you're going for realism (or surrealism) you should probably try upping the frame-rate if possible. The only other workaround is to trim out "tweens" between the start-point with even the head of the penis almost visible, and the end-point where the penis is pretty much as deep as it's going to get. Don't forget to shift the guy's posture to enforce his hip motions... He' is supposed to be the one fucking her, right? (at least traditionally with this position)
The single greatest thing you can add to this is going to be sound. I know, I get it in replies (prob'ly because I mention it often) all the time... Sounds for this kind of stuff aren't easy to come by. There are ways. If you're going to really advance (and you want it quicker/easier) take a little time and try your hand at foley. Remember, as a foley artist, you're just working "radio" so if you can find sounds that might seem believable for sex, use them. You can also find and friend or two who can be talked into a little questionable (if anonymous) voice work, and there's no reason you can give them "screen names" just so you can keep track of work done and credit given. The other side of this, you can go after a good "score" and call it a day. The score is the musical background and atmosphere, so think Enigma "MCMXC A.D."... A style of "meditation" music with several adequate tracks to set a loop like these to. Now, the music of Enigma is copyrighted, but there's probably plenty of similar "meditation" or "soft listening" music around somewhere where you can negotiate its use, or even have it for free... Check on the audio portal (good first stop)...
You can also consider holding auditions on the forums, or even outright begging... Post something to the effect of "I need a guy V.O. (no pay yet) Plz read..." In the title... As your founding message, ask for what you want. Don't worry too much about setting a full "audition" in so many words, I'd put the message literally as follows :
"Hello NG, I'm working on a project, and I need some basic masculine sexy sound track... There's no money in it yet, but should exposure reach a commission, I'll PM for further negotiations and details. Just post a try-out run, from excited through to climax, and I'll get back with you"
You could do the same thing with "female" instead of "male" in the title and message, and collect what seems to sound reasonable or good for selling the visual. Yes, you'll probably also get a lot of asinine and juvenile crap to go through at the same time, but it could pan out to your greater benefit as you cut and splice enough soundtrack to put together several workable vid's.
The bottom line is that good audio will make you, and it can take you over the top of the next level when you get into it and really use it effectively. Bad audio not only can, but will break you.. so a little care in what you release will be advised...
NOW, outstandingly, you made the buttons all work. You may never know how many don't manage that... So for complexity, and still delivering a pretty good and buyable set of clips here, you're off to a good momentum. I do look forward to your next... And remember, these are suggestions, how you use this is entirely up to you...
Don't forget to breathe, relax, and keep on keeping on... :o) I believe in you...
Really appreciate the effort in your review!
This is extremely helpful. Sorry for keeping my response short. I definitely took notes though. And yes, I got those shitty texts buttons to work lol. Those are pretty much the extent of my actionscript skills.
I am hoping to learn a bit more about *on / off* with symbols. IE_ on off glasses that don't interrupt the animation when you switch. I know how to do, on off with sounds.
Anywho; thanks again! Appreciate ya! You will most deff be in the next special thanks in credits!
It's pretty good tbh. A few things: With how you're using mask layers on the penis, it kida makes it look like it doesn't move at all... which it kinda doesn't xP But with the big thrust he does, it should penetrated notably. Really nice job on the mouth though.
I can say one thing: avoid the double framing. Have it go back to loop on the second last frame. Currently you have that slight glitch where it shows the same frame twice.
Oh, and look up tween easing if you are using that. You want it to move at slightly different speed throughout. I'm not sure if it does that atm. But I usually go with a slight "S" shaped curve. (with the "S" on the side)
Yeah, I noticed one of the poses peepee wasn't matching physics. I will fix that. I'm using CS3, so the special tweening features are absent, unless I'm not understanding the "S" motion.
Thank you! If you don't mind I will put your username in the thank you credits once I update this file.
A lot more cons than pros, but I'm rating it for what I think you were hoping to achieve.
Animation of facial expression
Animation of body motion (except for the leg in the air, it seems to move too much or too little depending on which part of the animation cycle it is in).
Overall art style
the near side labia don't move (far side does all of the moving)
leg (see above)
in #1, the overall girl animation seems strange. It's like they're on ice and she is being pulled toward him. Who knows, maybe they are on ice, but that isn't explained enough to make it feel natural.
(mostly for #1) Nipples and areolae move much much more than the breasts in general. The breasts have very slight motion, yet they move an excessive amount.
Lack of context. - I like a story or a situation. Background or something. It doesn't seem like that was your focus here, but still something you could add if you wanted to take it to the next level.
I really appreciate your feedback. It's not that I rushed animating it, just uploading it if you catch my drift. If I'm not going to put music, backgrounds, or sound effects I might as well put this in the art portal till the package is polished.
Thank you. If you don't mind, I will put your username in the thank you credits once I update this file with the previous things, plus some more animation.
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