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Wendy had too much drink yesterday...
So yeah, this is my first animation made in few days. The first try is bound to be a flop as they say. Met a lot of issues with Adobe Flash. But anyway, i'll try harder and there will be more in a week or two.
Is that Zues?
First animation at all? Or is this the first one you ever cranked out in just a few days (as opposed to weeks or months)? It's at least kind of impressive either way. I'm just curious.
Over all, (especially as a first ever animation) Good work! Seriously, you've thought of most of the bases and covered them. This is a good beginning "archetype" or "template" to work with. You've set up the buttons from the start to give a viewer choice of where to begin his view, and assumably, most would start from 1 on their first view, but many will choose 2 (and a few will only seek 3) after that.
Audio is what it is, and good audio can make you, while bad audio can break you. You kept this minimal approach, avoiding messy and distracting effects that might not sync' up well in playback and stuck to what you know. You didn't apply a music track, but that can also be an unsure bet with some viewers, so you're focusing on your animation quality. These are all good choices in a first animation, because too much too quick can overwhelm you. You also didn't go silent, taking on some of the audio responsibility to create something genuinely decent on your own. You also seem to have listened to it, yourself, so it's not too ridiculous, or earsplittingly annoying. Again, good job. Okay, believability could be considered an issue, but silly sounds that made kind of a joke of the sight didn't distract from what you were doing with the screen. I can get a giggle out of it, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. :o)
Finally, animation... Visually, you got the point across. Believable characters fucking... fucking... and cum. It is what it is. You're new to animation (as you've stated) so the particulars of detail are still as much a style question as anything to do with quality. It's not the most complicated or grandest story to tell, but you built up the anticipation to the obvious climax and finished... Again, without becoming Hugh Hefner (my spelling is terrible with names) or Shakespeare, you've done well. It's still your first time out of the gate, but I wouldn't call this a flop.
What would've gone the farthest for improvement with the least extra effort?
Rather than independently building loops, you might try animating the whole thing in a single strip (a little more complex than a storyboard, but not quite animatic)... If you do that, more or less all at once, from the start, you'll find a more consistent precision in the characters involved. Then you can go back to pick out the section of the strip to develop a loop at a time.
You could also consider putting a little more substance to the genitals instead of stripping down the rest of the characters. Yes, it's important to see the thing, but a larger cock would be easier to see without getting rid of the guy's belly XD... The real trick is going to be believably getting the girl wrapped around the thing without obviously splitting her in half like a block of firewood...lolz...
And finally, it's going to help you to put a little more actual motion in the action. Especially as you develop your skills, you'll find that more motion builds more excitement in viewing... She could stand a little more motion as well, like boobs actively swinging under her, and (in case you get around to it) ripples and jiggles travelling her ass... but I think I've built a pretty good list of things to work on as you go...
Again, you've done well, especially being new to animation and taking on the effort (and courage) of a decent porn skit. I hope you find some helpful stuff in this, and I definitely look forward to watching you continue to develop and grow your repertoire on NG...
Don't forget to breathe, relax, and keep on keeping on... :o)
Again, thank you for your feedback, it really helps a lot. Didnt really get the part with substances and blocks of firewood tho Xd
You know its not so easy to find a plausible sound and i think i dont need any because it would be a bit weird imo. Ripples and Jiggles are necessary too, i thought of them when i finished this.
It is definitely a bit under the average. But you do got a decent start imo.
Went very cookie cutter with the theme, characters and all that. (surprised you didn't go for oral tbh. Tends to be everyone's "first" xP)
Anyhow. Your style is kinda neat. Looks pretty okay. Nice too see you didn't went overboard with the sounds xP They're at least not annoying, so it's around a bit better than having none.
One sided content aside, the cumshots were quite good. Looping and motion wasn't too bad either. Not sure if it's supposed to be the same dude, but they are inkonsistent in body type.
Wendy is rather cardboard as a whole. But, that is also pretty standard in porn. So that's more of an observation than anything.
If you'd want some tips, I might could chuck some your way. All I can primarily suggest, is that you should prolly try to avoid the biggest porn tropes and archetypes. While they might seem like a "safe bet", just keep in mind that everyone and their mom thought the same idea xP
Finding a niche and/or focus tends to be safer in every way. As then you're not competing with ~90 % of the fandom ;3
Thank you for your feedback.
Yea, sometimes you sacrifice the guy's weight just so everyone can see the whole action without a giant belly hidin it xd
Adobe Flash was not a friend but the concept was good
An infernal battle between gold and acid.
Are you feeling it now, Mr. Krabs?
Too much coffee for Pencilmate...!
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