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This episode is based of my interpretations of the song Yeah from when I was 5. This is suppose to be the 3rd episode of Murica. It is however the 4th one that was made.
God this is bad, even for my standards. Seriously, fix your pacing. While you're at it, make sure less swearing is involved. (Check my series out for some pointers in regards to content.)
More jokes, less swearing. But I gotta hand it to ya', it's South Park of the Junior High.
Thanks, Trey and Matt are my heroes.
The content is ridiculous. I'm sorry but it isn't even satirically funny.
I had trouble hearing a significant portion of the dialogue. The sound quality was kinda bad and the voice acting wasn't very good. There was a bit too much profanity for my taste. There was something lacking. I feel like if these issues were worked out you would be getting a higher rating on your work.
Now for the good aspects. From what i could tell, your sense of humor isn't too far off the mark. Using profanity more effectively could really help. Again I had trouble hearing quite a bit of the dialogue so this review is going off what I could hear. This could quite easily be considered 3-4 star submission if it was more fleshed out.
P.S. Was this submission by any chance inspired by South Park? The animation style and profanity remind me of the show.
Anyway your work has potential.
I honestly learned everything I know from South Park. Trey and Matt are my heroes. Anyway thanks for the honest review. I don't have that much money to afford a proper mic and it breaks from time to time. Oh, and the profanity is used that way, because back when I was around that age I myself didn't curse, but most of my friends did in the manner shown in the episode. I did it that way to make the kids feel more realistic. Because, cursing is new and exciting to children which is why they do it so much. Thanks again for the review.
A starving village ask a water spirit to help them.
Strawberry clock forgets his ticket on the train but maybe he'll be ok
a clock day story
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