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Kagemusha Chapter 1

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Here's Chapt 1. As promised I will try to do an episode a month or so. The serious shader won out in the poll so I switched it to that.

**I know theres some de-sync with the lip synch- and honestly I dunno why thats happening since in the program it plays perfectly but on final render everything got messed up even though I tried it a couple different ways**

Special thanks to the VAs
Kristyn Mass
Ardailec
and Sir Undead

This is a redux of the old shinobi noir series I made a while back. Originally when I was going to redo this I was going to make a lead up to this but then I decided to do it more like Final Fantasy 13, story wise and have the EVENT at the beginning with flashbacks and exposition along the way to understand the characters so they show themselves more through action than just verbal stuff.

It might have gotten dull with an origin story from the get go (although there will be one later (approx Chapter 5 or 6) Because there are some characters that don't come in until the 2nd 3rd ep and if I did the other way, they wouldn't come in until 5th or 6th ep. Also this is more a drama with action elements than something like naruto which has more action/comedy or something.

Synopsis: Amari and Ryu get sent on an assasination mission that doesn't turn out so well. Ryu and Old man Chiaki have a secret discussion that might be overheard.

Next ep will have some new chars and my fav char- Hibiki which was modeled after the Hibiki char from the last blade but has a totally different personality/motivation/history etc

Patreon http://www.patreon.com/user?u=102503

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Usually, I'd be nice and give this a 5/5 stars, but I think this has some actual potential. So I will give you advice on how what I think will make the series better. But first, complaints:

First off: what bothered me the most was the inconsistent character models. They were good, yes, but they were inconsistent. One looked like he had much more detail than the other while one looked like he just had eyes and a fake beard on. I would like it if you either somehow give them all the same "base". If one has black lines to show where the nose is, everyone else should have one or he shouldn't have one. If everyone has the same eye style, this guy shouldn't look like he was torn straight from another anime. I think you get my point, if not, here's an easier example: If you're making a Dragon Ball Z Movie with Attack On Titan Characters tacked on, it would look very weird to see two different art styles meshed together.

Next off: The Animation. I know, this isn't a large studio, but please try to make them a little more "life like" when they move.

Then there's this: The characters and plot. Frankly, I have no idea who anyone is and where they come from. I don't know why they're fighting or what time period this is. I don't even know half the characters. Speaking of characters, they're very forgettable and not relatable. Sure, the "Lord" or Shogun or whatever he is, is a badass. Frankly, that's all I got from him.

There's also this: Pacing. Too fast. Too soon. I have no idea what's going on. Things happened way too fast without any real back story to it. I don't think just one scene explaining that this Lord has to be assassinated will tie everything together.

Finally, the fight scene. Awesome, yes. Style? Inconsistent. At times, you show them fighting slowly where later they start moving at fast speeds. The spinning was also a little bit weird. Typically, one would just step back or in fighting game mechanics: Dash back, while this guy...he spins. How does he not get dizzy? The fight scenes lacked any real effects. I mean, you got the camera shaking right, but I'll get to that later. There would usually be a small spark or bright light when swords strike each other. That really bothered me when I didn't see anything like that. Also, there is how slow the character models moved. I'll be honest here. If I was fighting someone who moved that slow, I would have probably killed them in the first two seconds.

How you can improve:

Character Models: You could try editing the models. Then again, not my expertise. While I don't have anything against the models, the fine details really bothered me.

Animation: You could try watching yourself in a mirror, watch every detail on how you walk or move, then try to mimic that as precisely as you can. You can also take some time to add in those little details instead of skipping over them.

Characters and Plot: Nothing I can really do here. I have no idea what's going on. It's like watching an entirely new series while starting on the 2nd or 3rd season. Best if you link me a prequel if you have one.

Pacing: Take time to explain the story more, show motives, character reactions, etc. Heck, what I do is try to write the character's reactions and what they would do to prepare for it. Then time skip to the actual fight. Basically: DON'T RUSH IT.

Fight Scenes: Ah ha, this is what I'm going to focus on the most. Fight scenes are typically better when they're fast and move realistically. You can have the craziest fight scene on Earth and as long as the characters move like how a normal human would move with those abilities and in that scenario, it's a good fight scene. If you make the fights about 2x as fast, that would have been a pretty sick action scene. People don't need to see how the characters move in fine detail, they just need the gist of it. Sure, you can add detail as long as it's fast and keeps the pace fast. We also have sound effects, visual effects and camera. Sound effects are fine as they are, maybe add a little bit of wind and kicking noises for when she tried to kick him. For visual effects, try motion blurring and sparks. Motion blurring for when the ninja girl moves at fast speeds to emphasis on the speed and sparks for when the swords clash. As for Camera, if it's shaking every time the swords clash (as in a very sharp shake), it would make the fight seem much more intense than it really is.

Note: I can't explain everything in words. It would be great of me if I could just...show you. But that would be too difficult for me and I don't have the resources (well the software anyways) to do so.

Thanks,
Sonicfanx1

Kel-chan responds:

Thanks for the tips- there's a prologue to this on my page

Now this looks epic!!!!!!!!
Can't wait to see more.

This is a really nice chinese cartoon. But the dialogue needs some work.

Ha! You Took My Advice! Congrats on the Daily Feature, and Nice Animation to Boot! Although I Thought it was gonna be Boring at First, it Turned Out to be Pretty Good.....Although I'm Not the Biggest Fan of Non-Flash Animations, this wasn't Bad at All! I Am Curious though......Considering the 3D Animation Style, I'm Guessing this was Made in a Program Similar to Garry's Mod......Am I Right?

Kel-chan responds:

yeah its miku dance which is a free 3d program for making dance animations- Im just using it for this.

I think I'm gonna stick with the 3d for a while yet- I want to be able to ulitmately make something like those final fantasy CGI things

Oh yeah, this is something great.

Credits & Info

Views
10,903
Faves:
53
Votes
32
Score
3.92 / 5.00

Uploaded
Nov 17, 2014
10:39 PM EST
Genre
Drama