Be a Supporter!

Credits & Info

Uploaded
Aug 14, 2013 | 7:17 PM EDT

If you liked this, check these out!


Author Comments

Follow us on Youtube - http://www.youtube.com/user/AzureProStudios

Shattered Heaven

Episode 1 "The Path Laid Out"

An original mecha animated web series based off the novel series of the same name.

A hundred years has passed since the rebirth of humanity. A new world, born from a catastrophe of its own making. The world has grown and technology has advanced. Genesis Global, the world's fore front developer of mechanized frames continue to help educate new generations. The New Year is upon us. For each year, a new path is revealed.

Cast in order of appearance

Narrator: Ty Konzak
Extras: Tamtu Bui, Heidi Tabing, Gerardo Paz
Mike Aquilus: Carlos Moreno
Grace Cooper: Corinne S.
Christina Efflorenso: Michelle Deco
Sean Repens: Brian Gilbert
Jen Fama: Jasmine Carbonell
Amy Caecus: Kira Buckland
Adam Novus: Adam Tilford
Severen: Niel Sumter
Catherine Henning: Brittany Lauda
Sarah Henning: Holly Hampson
Stephen Novus: Greg Nugent
Veronica Laboro: Jessi Nowack

Music composed by Project Trinity

Ending theme
"Broken Machine"
Performed by Amanda Lee
Lyrics and composition by Luke Thomas

Purchase the full song here - http://shatteredheaven.bandcamp.com/

Follow the series:

Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/ShatteredHeaven
Twitter - https://twitter.com/christilford

First novel available on Kindle -
http://www.amazon.com/Shattered-Heaven-Sins-Soul-ebook/dp/B007QOVL38

Reviews


SirBladewindSirBladewind

Rated 2 / 5 stars

Okay I'm a serious flash movie buff. I love indie story based stuff, especially when the creators put a lot of time and effort into each episode. Sometimes indie stories are more interesting and thought provoking than some big time cinema. Even simple fight scenes can become channels for emotions and thoughts of the viewer.

This unfortunately, is not one of those pieces. You have so much potential in this world that its a crying shame to say it too. Your art is bland and imprecise. The faces of characters look exactly alike and the only way I could tell the difference was from the fact that they have different hairstyles. Your audio is muffled and doesn't feel very lifelike. Character voices aren't believable, nor do they feel like the actors are putting their emotions and life into the role they play. It seems more like first or second take line readings. Its just overall bland and it upsets me because your idea is awesome but your execution feels so weak.

I hate to say this but this isn't going to turn out to be anything more than some of those bland tasteless series that pollute newgrounds's underworld unless you step up and make a change. I know you can do better too. For example the art in the end credits is much, MUCH better than the actual art in the video. If the whole SERIES was animated like that it'd feel much better to watch and make getting into this world you've created that much easier.
Your dialog can be improved a lot by trying to do less. You pack SO much into a single episode whereas you can slow down scenes a bit and put less dialog in there. While it is realistic to have a lot of talking going on, (because people do a LOT of empty talking in real life) empty talking isn't really important in stories unless it has an overall goal like improving characterization. You throw a wall of information at the viewer and theres only so much they can absorb at a time. Slow down. If you take your time on each scene and make the impact and speech more important then people will be hanging on your every word because every word will be important!

Now onto audio. You REALLY need a better mic or at least some clear speaking actors. Muffled voices are an easy way to remove people from the immersion of your world. You want them to picture themselves there, and to do that good sound effects are a MUST. Old radio serials relied on ONLY sound effects and look how successful they were. Sound is something that can paint pictures where animation or art fails so even if you art never improves if your sound effects feel real a person's imagination can supply what your art can't.

Now onto the acting. Your actors need some serious work. They(maybe you) read the lines off like they were just written on a page and only portray vague emotions in their work. I mean, I don't know if you've done any real life acting but it takes some setting up of the scenes to help actors get into their roles. If a person is supposed to be scared, do something to make them nervous and have them read their lines. My old acting teacher used to point a slingshot loaded with paintballs at us when we read our lines so we'd be nervous and try to read it fast and scared. If a person is supposed to be mad, have another character yell their lines at them and THEN have them respond. Do an audio take multiple times. If you really care about your series you will give it your all. Everyone can be an actor with the right motivation and that is all that you seem to lack in this department. A lot of your dialog seems to be casual, so casually talk with someone as you do your line readings. Get some good conversation in about their day, their dogs, whatever you feel like and then randomly ask them to read the line. They'll be so comfortable with talking that they'll read the line comfortably too and it will come of natural instead of stilted and stiff like it seems now.

You've got a LOT of potential here. Not a lot of people would have the bravery to take on a tough project like this and so you've got guts to try and make this work. But you've GOT to step it up if you want this to be anything great. As it is, its nothing special, but it can be. Put some more soul into it and it will take a life of its own, I promise.

Good luck. I'll be watching you.



naliyanaliya

Rated 5 / 5 stars

(greatly regrets voting 4 x-x)
amazing video! reminds me of... something i saw on adult swim sat. nights... a single man piloting a giant war suit... hmmm -.-



CreamForceNGCreamForceNG

Rated 4 / 5 stars

don't think you needed to include a long narration at the start. use your writing skills to tell the back story as you go along.



MOA-OZZYMOA-OZZY

Rated 5 / 5 stars

3:30 Cameo!! XD That just made my day, nice first episode, I can't wait to see how you improve in the future.



Eloc-FreidonEloc-Freidon

Rated 3 / 5 stars

I wanted to enjoy this, but the dialogue is cliche. None of it felt organic. Animation was fine. Is there such a thing as too much character exposition? It is when its forced. The first episode of a series should focus on the world. A spot for the characters to start.

It turned from an action scifi to a basic television drama way too fast.