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Uploaded
Sep 15, 2012 | 7:17 PM EDT

Author Comments

EDIT I made some minor tweaks such as correcting the actionscript for the directors note and to the petititon of some Svens hat hope this is kinda better
This is the first episode of my series called Suburban Life ironic title I have in overall 10 episodes planned with three more underway I will see the public response to this one and consider in making further ones Hope you like it Also yes I know it has some animation flaws but come on every pilot has it Anyway thanks for watching

Reviews


IronWalrus041IronWalrus041

Rated 4 / 5 stars September 17, 2012

How long did it take you to make episode 1 and 2? (just wondering :D) I like episode 2 :3 keep making more!


SuburbanLife responds:

Hey, thanks! It took me 3 months to do both parts (they're not separate episodes.) I have 10-11 episodes written. I actually made a last minute change, so there will be a 5 minute-ish short between episode 1 (this one) and 2. Thank you for your kind comment.


CamoRalphCamoRalph

Rated 1 / 5 stars September 16, 2012

I hate to sound cruel but for a series, this is really all over the place and not very engaging to watch.
For one, you're using well-defined music from Futurama, not to mention character designs that look like characters from other shows (sven just looks like cartman from South Park).

Secondly, the pacing is REALLY slow and too drawn out. I would spend time trying to tighten things up. The main problem I see is that time is spent on things that don't matter so much - like the teacher's smoking. Try to focus on things that actually assist and push the story forward. While I understand that making short films, let alone series, is hard work - I'm tempted to think that not a lot of time was put into the pre-production of this. By that I mean, the idea was there but it wasn't given time to mature or sharpen up. You need to be able to see a really rough version of your film first in order to assess if it's paced well and reading clearly.

Thirdly, I wouldn't put the pause/note in the middle. At first I thought that was the end of the movie! Put it at the very end ;)

Sorry to sound cruel, but this needs a lot of work, and could stand to be much simpler/straight forward. Anyways, keep at it!

Peace,
Cam


SuburbanLife responds:

Hey, yeah! Sorry about the note. Well, yes, this was like... say a trial version. I promise episode 2 will be better. Yeah, you convinced me, my friends told me to change Sven's hat, but I wouldn't listen, lol. Well, thank you for your feedback. I must confess, I made this in a rush and you can see a very great difference between the start of the movie and the end. (I'll upload part 2 in a second) (I didn't know flash had a limit!!! That was a last minute change.) This was more to learn rather than anything. Now I know I should use pencil instead of brush and so on, also, I wrote this episode when I was 12, and I finally got to animate it until now (14) And I have 9 episodes now (Going for the tenth one.) I promise humor has changed. I'm glad you took my animation into account, but really, thank you for criticizing my movie FAIRLY. Anyways, hope you like, or at least see an improvement in part 2. Also, sorry if my response doesn't make any sense, hehe. I'm not a native English speaker. Anyway, thank you.