Be a Supporter!

Credits & Info

Uploaded
Aug 13, 2012 | 5:10 PM EDT

Author Comments

So you never played chrystal monsters before?.................y ea I wish i hadn't
This is my first cartoon so I'm open to suggestion on how to improve it and try not to be too harsh on me :)

(also sorry for no preloader and loop, not 100% used to this atm)

Reviews


nyc334nyc334

Rated 5 / 5 stars August 14, 2012

I bet it's obvious... But the animation can use some improvement. I don't blame you though for a first animation. I would consider getting a drawing tablet and better audio recording device if you wish to do this for a living and make money off your animations. However if you're just doing this for fun and exploration just have fun. I would also consider you putting a replay button so It doesn't repeat. Anyway, A for effort?


FTWLBDoubleD responds:

thanks for the feedback, I just purchased a new audio microphone cause I was having to use my webcam lol also looking at a few flash tutorials to try and get some limb movement for my next one
thanks again


BluddtearsBluddtears

Rated 1 / 5 stars August 13, 2012

Kind of bland, could use some background music. It could also be a bit longer, but that's my preference. Also, your microphone clips pretty badly, and I would suggest backing away from it, tilting it to the side, or getting a new one, because too much air is coming from it. One thing you might want to do with your art is to thicken up the outlines, because when your outlines are too thin, it makes the characters look as if they have too much volume and can barely contain it within their figure. Still a good idea, but could be further developed into a better one.


FTWLBDoubleD responds:

yea I'm still not familiar with how to get background music but hoping to get that sorted for my next flash, and thanks on the tip on the outlines :)


MistyEntertainmentMistyEntertainment

Rated 3 / 5 stars August 13, 2012

Shows potential.

First of all what stood out the most was the voice acting. Try not to breathe into the mic too much, it's a bit annoying to listen to and isn't very professional. If you're talking into a microphone then maybe put a sock on the microphone?

RicePirate made a helpful video on how to improve voice acting quality.

The backgrounds didn't seem too detailed, and to be honest, didn't look that nice since you drew it with either the pencil tool or the line tool. You'll find that the brush tool generally gives you the best results. But of course there's the chance you don't have a tablet and are drawing with a mouse.

So maybe, vary in line thickness? It shows variety.

The characters look okay, but better line quality and something a bit more distinguishing would suit you well.

Maybe some background music or sound effects? They enhance the scene and you'd find making a parody with bgm and sfx will make it much funnier.

Just some suggestions.


People find this review helpful!
FTWLBDoubleD responds:

thanks for the suggestions, yea I mainly used the pencil tool but will give the brush tool a go and work on the backgrounds a little more next time
and thanks for the tip with the voice acting, will check that video out now :)