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Uploaded
Jan 30, 2012 | 9:13 PM EST
  • Daily 2nd Place February 1, 2012

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Author Comments

UPDATE: Uuuuh, front page?? Thanks a ton. :] And thanks for all the votes and reviews and advice. I've updated the movie with subtitles to make up for over processed audio garble.

My first newgrounds entry ever, as well as my first animation in years. It was made in part to get myself playing around with Flash again. It was also so I could get some sort of little intro for this story I've been working on, but have no intentions of animating(if it were, the style would be way different. Frame by frame awesomness that I'm not capable of now). Therefore this animations raises faaaar more questions than it answers. I worry that it won't stand too well on it's own because of that, but hey, twas a good exercise and stuff.

My apologies for the Frankenstein-esque mess that is the narration. I compiled all the clips in the most unorganized way ever, so in the end it turned into a hodgepodge of different volumes, voices, effects, and noise that was hard to fix after the fact. Blargle. Welp, lesson learned for next time.

So yep, I'm no animator(nor a voice actor, apparently), but it was fun to do. So will probably try some more stuff in the future...with less vibration inducing textures...and better audio.

Song credits:
George Shearing - Guilty
Yann Tiersen - Sur le Fil
Apocalyptica - Farewell

Reviews


pielover74pielover74

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Well done!

I liked it a lot. The story was brilliant. I don't think the audio was that bad for the story. I am a fan of subtitles, clear audio or not, but I could hear every word. Although in some animations this quality of sound would be awful, it worked for this piece, making it seem as a tale as old as time, recorded to remember the fate of young Dahlia.


People find this review helpful!

LittleGoreyLittleGorey

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Wonderful art and story. Only thing that needed improvement was the audio (but you already knew that :3:3)

(And, in my personal opinion, it could have been scarier >3>3)



EnactJudoEnactJudo

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Not bad at all

Overall impressive work, it was interesting to the end, but I had a few nitpicks with it. The audio quality was fairly bad, and I think you could have done a better job with it. Judging from the grain I'd even say you might have recorded the tune with a handheld microphone. Whether you invested some time into getting a better microphone, some editing software, tweaking the audio quality in flash when you export or even simply adding subtitles would have made it better.

Another note that bothered me narrative-wise was that I wasn't exactly sure which of the twins was dead after you announced it. You gave names, but I wasn't quite sure whether it was the one who liked dresses or the one that liked books until I replayed it. It probably happened because I didn't quite catch their names at the beginning (because of the audio), but it really wouldn't have hurt to add a little more description in the narrative (Say for example: Then Dalhia, "The quiet one", fell ill.")



SerannSerann

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Awesome, but....

Where will we be able to see/read the rest of the story?


KLawter responds:

It's basically this story that I don't think I can tell until I get the story JUST right and can illustrate it JUST the way I want it. But I plan for a graphic novel format one day once I iron out all the wrinkles. Though I may animate random excerpts from the story as exercise. Thanks for the comment. :)


TankdownTankdown

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Very nice

This story sounds lot like a fairy tale or myth, more mystery than facts. Shadows and sudden images suggests sins. Maybe there no general son involved, or demons. Just insanity of one sister pulling a knife on another. The monster reaching for the sister at the end may not symbolize revenge. The monster may only be angry. I hope this story continues, if not it remains a tale where darkness, or innocence, could have been anywhere.

Aside from my examinations, I will nick pick at one gross detail. Bones are actually beige, or a tan color. It's a process in labs that makes them white.

Are teeth suppose to be white....maybe I'll google that. :p