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This took me about 14 hours over a period of 2 days. I put in some shading and highlights to help the art and took some advice from many different people in the reviews of my last video.
Aeris - Autumn Stroble
Leo - Edwyn Tiong
Krug - Edwyn Tiong
Ternaldo - Nick Tiner
And the music:
Day of the Tentacle - Hotel Interiors Present
Baldur's Gate 2 (selected tracks)
Final Fantasy 8
Guilty Gear X
Max Payne 2
Miscellaneous stuff from online
My youtube channel: youtube.com/ocarinaplaya
Omahdon's channel: youtube.com/omahdon
Original comic: http://www.vgcats.com/com ics/?strip_id=110
Visit Scott at VGCats.com for more comics.
Download your own rat flail gif: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/3 063215/avatar.gif
Not bad, but better pacing and sound work next.
I know, you work with what you have, but Aeris should sound angrier and more serious, as that is her role in the comic. Your interpretation sounds a little too girly to me, meaning some of her forcefulness is a bit lost.
Also, Leo is too goofy for me, and his voice a bit too deep. In my mind, he should have a slightly higher voice and say stupid things with straight-faced idiocy.
the reason I get onto you for this is simple: the side characters sounded EXACTLY as I've always heard them in my mind, those voices were splendid and felt more precise and thought out than Aeris and Leo.
ART: The character outlines in his comics are far bolder than the ones you've used, and the background textures (which are really easy to do) give his backgrounds more depth and make the characters stand out even MORE. You could use that here.
Also, his shot framing is more precise and pulls me in more than the framing of the shots used in this animation. Don't be afraid to do a widescreen shot at the end, or reverse wide screen for the tall shots. It'll feel more 'comic-bookish' sure, but you're adapting this, so that's fine so long as it keeps the spirit of the comic.
Ah, and why change Pika-Hulkomon so much? He looked awesome in the comic, making him black just feels like a pointless step in the lazy direction.
SOUNDS: Vocal quality isn't great, rent a mic for ten bucks from a pro shop one day and knock all the voices out, you'll be amazed at the quality increase. Or buy on secondhand.
The sound effects are largely lackluster and improperly balanced, but I do like the choice of the individual sounds, so good job there. Next time, just brink them out and let them amplify the animation more.
OVERALL EASY STEPS TO IMPROVE: Better mixed audio, thicker outlines and more pronounced stroke on your art, use textures, pay attention to the details and backgrounds, and try and bring the proper emotion to the table next time.
TO GO EVEN FURTHER: Up your audio quality and work on framing those shots a bit more.
As a final criticism, you should really put a button at the end of the animation using the site's button to link back to the original comic. Support the author, sir, because he worked hard to give us the comic, and though you're careful to plug YOUR work and your friends that helped, Scott Ramsoomair is only barely mentioned at the end of the text description below your video.
It's not a question of originality, but about giving credit where credit is due. Follow these simple critiques and your next video will shine with the beauty of a Bankai Rat Flail.
Never thought that Ares would have such a hot voice.
Would have been a perfect 10 had it not been for that annoying numa numa song... Seriously, use a better ending theme next time. Other than that, the animation was fluid and the script was comedic.
HORRAY FOR NUMAH NUMAH 100/10!!!!!!!!!!!
How will Kratos survive the Night?
A story about a kid and idk...
A short muisc video based on the classic song "The Window Cleaner" sung by George Formby
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