Tired of waiting?
Click here to disable ads!
You are not logged in. If you sign up for an account,
you can gain additional voting power over time, allowing your vote to have an even
greater impact on submission scores!
Eh, was bored and sounded funny to me. So I made it into a flash animation, for others to view and perhaps laugh at it's randomness.
Understanding the fact that this has a good idea, a baseline, for your story it doesnt really go anywhere. It is very one area orientated and you should try and add a bigger storyline (for example how he turned into a circle or what it was like being a square). This is constructive critisism by the way, and you shouldnt take it too personally.
Also I believe that whilst the lip syncing was mediocre, it could be worked on...
Overall, I believe it is a good foundation for improvement in the animating world. I do laugh at it's randomness but if you expanded your storyline, and lengthened the animation then it would be much more enjoyable for others to view.
Try to add some background to your story because I wasn't really clear what was going on. Be sure to establish where and when something happened and there are always really REALLY easy ways to do it. For example, say I drew a picture of a robot with a gun and he is standing on weird terrain shooting aliens. We can assume he is on another planet, but it isn't really clear. I could take 5 minutes to make a few pictures and do a tween zoom in on a galaxy, then a star cluster, then a particular solar system, then a planet. Maybe even show the robot's space ship coming in to land. now there is no question of where he is.
as for what is going on, you could also possibly create that in the establishing shot. I feel like this was a "before and after" animation and we just got to see the after. clearly show what happened to this shape before he was a "circle." it can even be something as random as he was lounging on a beach drinking rum punch when he suddenly poofed away and appeared in a house... and OH GOD! HE'S A CIRCLE!!!
Finally, have something happen in the end. Even if its just the character freaking out. That would be a funny ending. Or maybe make him kill the square or something. I honestly had no idea what was up with that square.
Also, if its an animation about cute shapes try to keep your language kind of clean unless you clearly establish maybe one character that CONSTANTLY curses as a run on joke.
Oh! and try not to breathe into your microphone so much. Set the mic down further away from you and speak louder instead. You'll get a better sound. If you cant seem to make the characters sound exactly how you want them to, just ask the NG community for help. there are tons of voice actors out there.
Hm let's see...
It's a kinda weird story, didn't really understand it well.
Also the lip synching is kinda off, the sound plays first then the lips move, either way, its kinda nice, I would love if you made a series ;D
The first instalment in a new Wildlife Documentary Series
First episode of 2 ants 1 president
Rej displays his twirling talents
newgrounds.com — Your #1 online entertainment & artist community! All your base are belong to us.