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Dec 5, 2009 | 2:26 PM EST

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Author Comments

*Edit: Hell yeah, I got into a collection for the FIRST TIME EVAR! Thanks everyone for suggesting it!

Hey guys! This is my submission for Christmas '09. In this game, Jesus has returned, to TAKE... BACK... CHRISTMAS!

The evil Ultra-Pope is causing havoc, so God sent down his son Jesus to put a stop to it. Did I mention that Jesus is now 20 stories tall and shoots lasers? Well, he is 20 stories tall and shoots lasers. Not like shoop da whoop lasers; eye lasers.

Anyway, the object of the game is to survive as long as possible and get a high score (there is an online leaderboard, by the way). To get points, destroy buildings by punching them and kill enemies with lasers. All enemies can be killed with lasers. If you can't seem to get an enemy to die, try using lasers in a different way. The longer you last, the harder the game gets, and eventually you will get to fight the Ultra-Pope himself. Naturally, awesomeness ensues. Since I am obsessed with easter eggs, there is a secret box to insert a secret code that allows a secret thing to happen. Sssshhhhh.

Controls:
Left mouse button to use lasers.
A and D keys to move left and right.
Spacebar punches.
T toggles music.
Q toggles quality.

This took me like, two months of not non-stop work, so be sure to play it, leave a comment, and check out all of this year's other christmas submissions. Happy politically correct holidays everyone!

Reviews


IronGleetIronGleet

Rated 5 / 5 stars December 5, 2009

hilarious

... you give Jesus the mockery this Christian superhero so richly deserves yet sorarely recieves!

Hail! Resons Greetings to all! God is dead. Men are free. There are no guarantees!


People find this review helpful!

HannadHannad

Rated 5 / 5 stars December 5, 2009

SUPER JESUS!

Really fun game, but it's a bit too hard for my likings. The laser wasn't too powerful, and the swarms of babies(?) kept killing me. Really funny, though, and now on Christmas morning I shall imagine a giant, 20 story tall Jesus shooting eye lasers at everyone! :D


People find this review helpful!
UberCream responds:

Hey thanks a lot. The babies were fetuses, by the way. Merry Christmas and stuff!


carmaster789carmaster789

Rated 5 / 5 stars December 7, 2009

EPIC

this is the best jesus related thing EVER. nice work ubercream


People find this review helpful!
UberCream responds:

Hey, thanks bra. Now I'm gonna go eat a banana.


KoffiDoodKoffiDood

Rated 5 / 5 stars December 5, 2009

This game is the savior

I played this game for over an hour, and l still cant get enough of this.



ArchawnArchawn

Rated 5 / 5 stars December 5, 2009

MWAHAHAH!

I am super Jesus, destroying everything in my path!

MWAHAHAHA

And I was right--this is one of those games that I play for a long time, then say, "DID I JUST PLAY THIS DUMB GAME FOR HALF AN HOUR?!" And I mean "dumb game" in a good way, of course.

Haha, back to killing dinos with my laser eyes.


People find this review helpful!
UberCream responds:

Lol, thanks man. That's exactly what I was going for.