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Elements preview

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Author Comments

file was original a avi becuase i made it to hand out on dvd... but i wanted to get feedback fast so i converted to a swf... if you like the concept tell me so i can continue the first episode... if not i will just leave it too rot... thankz

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pull.

this has potential, but don't switch to afterburners just yet...
good- relatively lengthy, somewhat good plot
bad- obvious Ichigo copypasta from Bleach, a bit of a typical element-based plot, voice-overs...
go on, expound upon those, and I hope to see the real one a success.

not bad at all.

this shows some promise. if you follow up i am sure it will be a NG hit. good luck to you

FlashManJR14 responds:

thanks

NO offence

I think you have a small speak impediment. You should ask someone to do audio for you like .... me or something. I'm not going to lie, I like this story OK but unless you get really good at voice acting and drawing I wont have any interest on watching this if it's your solo project.

FlashManJR14 responds:

lol yea i know but dont worry the voice actin wont be like it was in this preview

Borrowed too much from others

Every artist has influences on his work, but I think you've crossed into copyright issues. Particularly at the end when you see what is clearly a character from Bleach. Before that, he looked a lot like a character from DBZ with different hair.
The dialogue was a bit heavy handed, you don't need to put such a heavy emphasis on certain words and phrases. Try talking like you're talking to a friend in the same room, rather than making a speech.

FlashManJR14 responds:

i did this fairly quick to get the idea outhere and see if it was worth spending time on because im not gonna spend a billion hours on something and then nobody likes it... its just the way i am

can be improved but seems alright

The art looks good but well during the running scene it looked a bit glitchy. I hope this doesn't sound rude but well you gotta continue this man. I think its fricken annoying how many trailers/teasers/first episodes are made then a series is just abadoned for no reason. Sorry to dump that on ya its just I would greatly prefer it if you continued with this.

FlashManJR14 responds:

no need to say sorry this is why i uploaded it to get honest responses... reviews like this is gas to a car... thanks most likely im going to continue with the first episode.

Credits & Info

Views
3,701
Votes
6
Score
3.25 / 5.00

Uploaded
Feb 22, 2009
1:34 AM EST
Genre
Action