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This is the first in an intended series about the classic tortise and hare race. I am attemting to put a spin on it in a cute old fashioned cartoon way. Hope you enjoy it.
Not bad at all
The art was good, and the story was quite entertaining. You could work on the animation a bit, but that's all. Good job.
It was good, the animation was well done, but this was not perfect by any means.
1. Get a preloader to load your movie, or at least a play button. People with slow internet might not be able to view it all at once without that. If you don't know how to make one, you can get one from the Downloads section of Newgrounds.
2. The speech was quite hard to understand at parts. The birds high pitched voice, not to mention the speed of it, was hard to interpret, and the tortoise wasn't clear either. Subtitles, maybe?
3. Resize your stage!! There was a lot of graphical errors in this flash, simply because you were working in an area which wasn't the same size as your stage. Either use the full space or just resize.
4. Practise your timings a little more. The movie looked like it had each part crammed together too much. If you'd spread it out a little more, like a moment between each character's speech, and maybe a little more emphasis on the rocket blasting off, not to mention a pause before the bird's line at the end, it could have improved the whole thing.
But there were good points in it, too. For example, your graphics were very good for what there was, and the sound clips were 'clean', i.e. didn't have much noticeable background noise to interrupt it. The humour itself was a little stale, I'm afraid. Well, carry on, if you fix up your errors, you'll be a great animator.
The main problems I saw with it were:
1. It was too short. Left an empty taste in my mouth.
2. I think you meant to make the window smaller, am I right?
It was still decent, though.
awesome i love how the bird they talks so fast and how the rocket just flies away at the end
Can't wait for the actual tortise and the hare episode!
But this was awfully short (even for a short)
This is the story of a fearless girl and her encounter with the wicked cold wind god
Art school and religion aren't that different...
a short school assignment
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