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Score: 10

"Cool!!!"

by: Eduardogd

date: October 10, 2008

So the sprite is a bad work...

Score: 2

"Amateur."

by: PookatDino

date: October 10, 2008

As far as sprite flashes go, this was rather poor.
The animation (and again, I'm keeping in mind this was a sprite flash) was very poor, if you are going to use sprites rather than things you drew by hand you really have to put a lot of effort into making those extra in between frames that keep the animation from looking amateur.
There were many sequences of just very boring dialogue with nothing going on.
On the subject of dialogue this story is really very dull; it seems like a scatterbrained "MAH EPIC ADVENTSHURE YAYZ" based on .hack//sign and unfortunately this sort of thing is completely common and completely uninteresting for someone looking for some new dynamic storyline.
A HUGE turnoff for this is just the frequent spelling and grammatical errors. It made some of the text painful to read. I would suggest looking for someone experienced in peer review to make sure you get rid of that problem because honestly I can not take a flash seriously when some of the text is not even correctly spelled.
So, heavy use of unmoving shapes and drawn out boring text: D:
Dull 'cheesy" storyline with typos: D:
A predictable plot that still feels like it is going no where: D:

I admit I am really not a fan of sprite flashes, because there is something very unartistic about it. Or at least that is the vibe I get.
But I can still enjoy them if they are really dynamic and amazingly done, unfortunately this is not one of them.

Score: 4

"lol Yea morak"

by: Latkid

date: October 12, 2008

It was an ok one but you just got moraks sprites like 4 days ago try to take a little more time with it and when their talking make them look like their breathing (banned story is best for the maple story guys) but over all its ok for your just 3 weeks of doing this

~Stykes

Score: 7

"Getting better"

by: spritefan

date: October 14, 2008

Well I won't lie, your doing pretty well for just 3 weeks of animating *gives generic thumbs up pose* One thing I find people on Newgrounds is a massive hate towards videos with poor grammar. My first flash submission 4 years ago got blammed mainly cause of it lol. Now I feel like I won't submit anything till it's completely worthy of at least daily 5. Anyways enough about my self, improve grammar a bit, also spend more time on aligning frames better, like the stance frames when ever he moved in his stance he'd move back and forth, make sure you have it well aligned so the character isnt moving everywhere zoom in and move the whole character with the arrows keys in flash while editting if you have to make it more precise.

About PookatDino comment 2 below me, when you responded you said he gave no suggestions, well he did a little bit just in a kinda rude manner. He said correct grammar and spend some extra time making it look good in between some frames to make it look amateur, also said the scenes could be more exciting and isn't too original.

The reason I pointed that out is that sprite videos are disliked on Newgrounds now-a-days and people just get mad whenever one is thrown in the portal. So you will receive a bit of rude comments and maybe even strong criticism but that's how Newgrounds is.

Maybe submit your videos to youtube also for a more friendlier environment... :D

Fix those mistakes in the next episode I'll criticize the next a bit to help you get one step higher on animating :3

Please don't take any of this offensively I don't mean it at all people on here just give strong criticism or shit comments like the first one.