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Sep 13, 2006 | 11:41 AM EDT

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  • Half-Life
    Half-Life Gordon Freeman and friends get spoofed in a variety of fan-made cartoons!

Author Comments

====!!!IMPORTANT!!!====

If your PC is slower than 2GHz you'd better to go to options screen and turn Blood Says and Interactive Enviroment off and turn Simple Shells on. Also, set music volume to maximum.

Cool 2D shooter with great physics. Shot your enemies, blow 'em with a grenade, make a fast moving cart smash them, or just drop a box on their heads. Face 11 types of enemies and break through 22 levels of fun.

Reviews


morrowindskymorrowindsky

Rated 0.5 / 5 stars July 5, 2010

Clunky, cluttered, and craptacular.

In all honesty, it was hard giving this game even one star. First off, the base gameplay mechanics are, as the title says, clunky--at best. In many cases, I found myself lagging, despite my respectable system, which was made even more unbearable by the "camera" system, which almost instantly switches directions the moment you move the cursor behind Freeman.

The music isn't even music. It's a 3 second loop of the same 5-note drum beat, without any noticeable change. The sound effects are sparse. In fact, I rarely even heard anything EXCEPT the music.

As for the physics you touted? Well, let's just say that Isaac Newton is rolling in his grave right now.

The parody was hard to stomach. Yes, I understand it's a parody. What I don't understand is why the common perception of parody is purposefully poor writing and stale jokes. I skipped as many dialogue instances as possible.

The graphics are also quite terrible. The blood is red yarn, characters are quickly slapped together and stiff (and yes, you could have hidden the joints a lot better than you did), and the backgrounds are either bland, gradient-filled blocks with physics objects slapped in front of them or the same thing with low-quality replications of in-game objects from Half-Life 2 slapped on top.

Finally, the most atrocious part of this entire ham of a game--the constant misspelling. "Conrols." "Shot your enemies." I admit, I am a bit of a grammar and spelling Nazi, but this is ridiculous regardless.

I think its safe to say that despite whatever time you spent on it, it is one of the worst Half-Life themed Flash games on this site. I'm normally not this cruel, but come on. This is ridiculous.


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littlekozlittlekoz

Rated 5 / 5 stars June 28, 2010

@robo987

you can,get dragged up by it then crowbar it,nub :3


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XCVGVCXXCVGVCX

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars June 25, 2010

Good Idea, Anyway

It lacks polish. The basic idea is fine, and the graphics are okay. But the whole thing feels rough and unpolished. The menus are crude, the music sucks, there is no transistion at the end of the level. The controls are awkward and there is no tutorial. In my opinion, this was simply posted before it was ready.


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nathan1857nathan1857

Rated 5 / 5 stars June 12, 2010

2D Wonder

This is a pretty good version of HL2 in a 2d perspective and the game has a good length, could be longer though.. But gets a 10 (was a 8) because this is a game with Gordon Freeman in it!



DottoriusDottorius

Rated 1 / 5 stars June 7, 2010

Awful

Although I like your newer games here on newgrounds, I'm going to have to say that this is, pardon me, the worst bloody game you have ever made. But I like you, and your newer games, so you'll get one star for that.

The story is obviously a joke, and the whole game is obviously a parody of HL2 as well, and people seemingly can't understand this. For this, you get another star, because it's fucking hilarious. "Wake up! Wake the fuck up now!"

You kind of ruined my morning with a game like this, though. No star for that.

The aiming is awful. No star for that.

I can't look up - What the hell? No stars for that.

I couldn't be arsed with playing past the second level of the prologue - Because I got bored after I died because I couldn't jump from one building to another.
Half-Life 2 has a momentum system - When you run faster, you jump further.
In this HL2 parody, Gordon apparantly carries a momentum-cancelling device, so no matter of fast he runs, he will always jump the same length.
And if I want to jump across the <TINY> gap between those two buildings... I will have to jump from the very bloody edge of the damn buildings.
No star.

All in all:
2/10
1/5

Don't bother improving this, though. Make more Endless War games! :D


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