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Just something I did for a project in creatvie writing. Enjoy!
I know you posted this quite a while ago, so I won't go crazy and say "Omg you need to work on your animation" Even for how long ago this was, it wasn't too bad.
Starting at 10
-2 for mediocre animation
-1 for drawn out story
Overall, not bad. Obviously this was a long time ago, and you've improved a lot, (I saw Chopsticks in Japan)
an intresting new story
little different than the one i know... its pretty funny... probably took awhile because almost every post i see is about 10 seconds long
wow thats stupid
there is NO point to this movie.
it make no sense whatsoever.
It's suppose to be a parody of goldly locks and the three bears...maybe that'll help.
hope it wasnt a midterm cause it wasnt very good. but it didnt sux. it just wasnt very funny, creative, but not funny. maybe read a few stories to children and notice how much they react when u actually inflect ur voice ( and as wierd as it sounds, even though u feel silly doing it, the more u do it the more children learn) and ud have a much better idea of how to leave the story the same, but it would improve some just from that alone. on newgrounds, adults are bigger physically, but mentally slightly less capable than most small toddlers, so inflecting ur narrator's voice is even more important. good effort though, considering. notice how people naturally inflect their voice when they speak, do that in ur narration. btw, i didnt think u were going for the violence score so u get a neutral 5 for non-effort, though the apples falling... oh alright, 7, but dont push it young lady.
this was not bad at all.
A starving village ask a water spirit to help them.
Strawberry clock forgets his ticket on the train but maybe he'll be ok
a clock day story
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