Score: 5
"Definately could improve, but nice"
date: November 7, 2004
I like your sci-fi style here, its rarely you see a nice kind of futuristic type flash on the NG so this was definately a change, and a nice one at that :)
Graphics were ok but they seemed a little TOO MS Paint looking for my liking, and those brown lines didnt look too good, but i liked the way you drew the gun with the flashing hi-tech bit. The music was mostly relaxing and I dont feel that it suited the exciting furturistic storyline, and it seems a shame there were no voiceovers with this they could have really gone a long way.
For now this remians ok, but if you want to get it beyond the 'hmm so-so' mark and make it into something people will want to keep coming back to, here are my suggestions in imrpoving this Episode of the Vortex:
1) Clean up the graphcis a little, they seem a little too MS Paint and kiddyish. Use more realistic, metallic looking futuristic graphics maybe creating light relfections on the robot and metal things to give it that pure 'hi-tech' effect.
2) Please use different music. I dont really think the relaxing piano style music at the beginning matches well with the sci-fi style and what is supposed to be a exciting beginning. Making it more for example jumpy and dramatic will give the audience that action-packed atmosphere when viewing.
3) Its a shame you didnt add voiceovers, but you still could - perhaps when the flash begins the music could be loud but when the voices talk still have the music on in the background but make it quieter? Its just a suggestion but either way please add some kind of voiceover, I hate reading from just text. Text doesnt really give you the right feel, you cant tell with the characters text his emotions and feeling like you can with voice.
All-in all average but it could definately use some improvement, I hope you found this helpful :)
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~T_C
