Retarded Animal Babies - 04/20/2004 Author: DirtySyko | Interviewee: Dave I recently had the chance to interview one of the greatest flash animators on Newgrounds, Dave, the creator of the popular series known as Retarded Animal Babies. What was the inspiration behind starting the Retarded Animal Babies series? Too much alcohol on too late a night. It was 2AM, and RAB1 got written in about 45 seconds amidst the first scrawlings of character sketches. All I knew was that they had to have big noses. I'd been making Flash animated shorts since 2000 and just wanted to start up a new series. I had no idea where it would air, what I'd do with it, etc. I just wanted to create something/anything...that's what 99.999% of the other artists on Newgrounds are like, too, I think. It's just doodling in Flash. Flashturbating? How long did it take to develop and perfect the five main characters seen in Retarded Animal Babies? Also, do these bizarre creatures resemble anybody in your life? One day...one long, weird day. The morning after I woke up and tried to decipher the drunken scribbings of the evening before, I immediately storyboarded it, inked it, colored, recorded and assembled, in one long 16-hour day. From concept to creation in under 24 hours, RAB just shat out of me. All over you. The characters (far from perfected, mind you) are all different parts of my own personality. It's really helped me sort a lot of things out. Everyone's got lots of sides of their personalities, and I'm no different. But I got to split them up and observe them without having to be insane (at least, not completely). When you released the first episode of Retarded Animal Babies, did you have any idea that it would become the phenomena it is today? Naw, after having choked down mediocrity with every other series I've done, my spirit had utterly decayed and I was basically just making RAB for myself. Had no idea where it would air, and didn't really care. This is the profound secret behind my favorite elements of RAB1: It's not made for you, him, or her. I just wanted to make it for myself. It's definitely cool (albeit confusing to me) that a lot of people like it, though. RAB2-9, on the other hand, are all thank-yous for my quirky little fanbase. This is why nothing's ever gonna top RAB1. I can't get the audience outta my head now. After sitting on RAB for about a month, I figured WTF and submitted it to Newgrounds which I knew absolutely nothing about (Hentai banners make the site a bit seedy-looking to most...even me). First ten minutes...100 fucking views. Whoa. I think I'm home now. And now exactly one year later, I am still overwhelmed on a daily basis at the coolness of NG, and it's faithful users. I want to have sex with Newgrounds. Your series has managed to obtain so much fan base that you acquired your very own section at Newgrounds under Genres and Series. Not many flash artists get that privilege, so how does this make you feel? It's great...only took three episodes to get its own page, too. But it was kind of inevitable anyway...for some reason people kept "5-ing" it and after you get enough high-rated shows in a series Tom can't really help but throw you a bone and make an icon for you, etc. After all, artists like me are providing all this content for his site totally free, so it really is the least he can do. But it's definitely a two-way street because Tom brings legions of viewers to otherwise obscure artists. Anyway, Tom emailed me right after RAB1 came out and stuck it right on the home page. Very cool. I'm not sure of his name, or if he even has one, but the little animal seems to have an unhealthy obsession with Bruce Willis. Is this obsession nothing more than a mere joke, or is it actually a way to show the world about your obsession with Bruce Willis and the movie Die Hard? For the record: their names are just Hamster, Puppy, Cat, Donkey, and Bunny. I have no imagination, but also this helps serve up the characters as "any-characters," which allows people to identify themselves in the characters better: anyone's ticket to popularity. Anyone can imagine themselves as a cute hamster, but less people can as a hamster named "Doug" or some shit. Sidebar: Only after around RAB3 or 4 did I realize with a hard slap to my forehead that the donkey character in Shrek is also named "Donkey." That won't fly anywhere but online, so if anything big ever happens to RAB then I'll probably bite the bullet and give 'em all names. As for Bruce Willis, it's just a joke from RAB1 I kept perpetuating into the ground. There has been talk that your series is similar to that of Happy Tree Friends. Do you have any thoughts or opinions concerning this matter? All I can say about that is: why doesn't anyone ever blast HTF for ripping off Alvin and the Chipmunks, Care Bears, Looney Toons, or any other cartoon that featured cute (a relative term, of course) animal characters? Has HTF really cornered that market? Anyway, HTF is super-quality, professional production. A real investment; this thing is the JOB of whoever's making it. For someone like me farting out cartoons whenever I get a little free time, it's a REAL compliment to be placed anywhere near the same conversational ZIP CODE of HTF. The episode "Magic Animal Babies" won you a $6,000 home bar prize pack! What's the news on this? Do you use it often? Do you brag to your friends? Are you finding yourself waking up next to a hooker more and more each day? I must know! My penis grew another ten inches longer than it already was. So yeah, it's up to triple digits now. Seriousness aside, in person, I am honestly, borderline suicidally humble as fuck, but I knew that Magic Hat thing would smoke all asses. It didn't even feel like winning...it felt more like I was simply making a contracted movie for Magic Hat. I've never been more confident about anything. And sure enough, it was a totally embarrassing landslide, cool as the other contest entries were. Anyway, I once again drank myself silly with 50 close friends until 4:30 this morning. The bar is choice...I'm happy I got the opportunity to snag it. It's been in my living room since Halloween (monster Halloween bash!). The band (co2rocks.com!) I'm in is talking about getting a bus in the next year or so...the bar will probably end up in that. You mentioned in Retarded Animal Babies 7 that it would be your last episode, because of a job you were supposed to get, but you did not get that job, and went on to make episode 8. My question is, is this beautiful series going to continue on, or has it finally came to an end? eah, sorry about going back and forth with everyone about that. People actually seem to care about the series, and I should have waited until I actually got that job before talking about hanging up RAB, and even then, not with such heavy-handed definitiveness. At any rate, I have a new job now, working nine hour days with a one-way commute tagged on both sides of that nine. I enjoy 3-5 waking hours per day not involved with work. Not bad, but not the 16 daily hours I had to throw around when I was unemployed for two fucking years! All the same, while RAB10 hasn't even been written yet, and there's just no time at all for me to start, I won't say it'll never happen! I REALLY want to make at least one more, and I'll be really unhappy if you don't see it by the end of the summer. And yeah, don't forget, it didn't end at RAB8. There is a RAB9 on the DVD...and it's my second-favorite one. So...to anyone who wants a RAB10 on Newgrounds... help me sell every remaining copy of my DVD (umop.com/dvd.htm!!), and I think I'd be able to justify quitting my job. Tell everyone you know to send me the shiny nickels. I wish dearly that RAB was my job. I love working on it. Only YOU can get that to happen. I are countingest on you. Alright, enough with RAB talk, let's dig into your personal life! What are some of your hobbies besides creating toons? I play keyboards in a modern rock band called CO2. Pseudo-internet celebrity is great...I have a million "virtual fans," but being able to actually BE IN FRONT OF even just a couple dozen people is (on good nights) much more gratifying! I also have a 25-year-old collection of over 400 Lego sets. I love those smiling little astronaut guys from the '80s. Besides selling Retarded Animal Babies merchandise, what are some of the other ways you earn the big bucks? Pshaw. If that were the case, would I really have to suck corporate ass for nine hours a day? How's your sex life? I'm just a monster in the sack. My dick is absolutely terrifying. Nobody ever asked before...thanks for allowing me to finally, publicly clarify my natural capacity for penultimate sexual mastery. I want to know a list of your favorite things, so here it comes. Movie? Cartoon? Food? Car? Band? As stated in my bio on Newgrounds, coming clean on this kind of crapola can only serve to incriminate me. Why admit anything, when everyone's so unique about this kind of shit? Sure, maybe 0.01% of readers also thought Back to the Future was the bestest movie ever (I'm even considering selling all the Lego and buying a DeLorean, for the love of fuck), but the other 99.99% are now alienated and surfing elsewhere. Bless 'em, they have every right. Some people might not know this, but you used to have a mullet. On your website it even shows the transformations you went through over the years. Now you have stuck with having long hair, but no more mullet. I am like you. We both have long hair and sometimes don't get the respect we deserve, but what I want to know is: Will this mullet ever return? Bitch, everyone respects my hair. Actually it ain't up to me any more. My wife won't let me cut it. Not sure if I want to, but it's a decision that I can't make. So it's not something I give much thought to. Well those are all the questions I have for you. You are hands down one of the best animators on Newgrounds, and it was an honor interviewing you. Thank you! Donkey, Hamster, Puppy, Bunny, and Cat all love you. Hot wet ones to all. I are mentally spooning each and every reader. Thanks for watching RAB. Fart. THE END Ending Notes: I think it is safe to say that Dave is a very unique individual, and his animations are pure genius. I was also flattered when he called me a bitch. If you have not yet seen the Retarded Animal Babies series, I recommend you go watch them NOW! Check out these Portal submissions by Dave: --select-- Website: umop.com Age: 39 Gender: Male Habitat: Canton, CT Job: artist/animator Favorite Films: porno Favorite Bands: anything I say here will only serve to incriminate me.