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At 11/6/08 03:44 PM, Colombiana wrote: Me neither and I love ancient Greek/Latin stories. They're original. Compared to the bible, they rule in making stories.

Exactly, Greek myths kick ass, there's violence, sex and betrayal, it's really like a collection of awesome movies, except they're not movies. Plus thanks to Greek myths we had some kickass TV shows.

At 11/6/08 03:03 PM, 36Holla wrote: Now Teshub, who was one of Kumarbis sons decides to overthrow Kumarbi. Kumarbi decides to create a monster to help him out, so to do this, he has sex with a rock 15 times (>_________>), and a monster child is born from that (yes having sex with rocks can cause children, don't ask questions).

Well,

Whatever gets your rocks off.

AHYUCK HYUCK HYUCK fuck

At 11/6/08 05:00 PM, Idiot-Finder wrote: Don't forget from the myths I've read, Zeus is kind of like Bill Clinton if you know what I mean

You wonder why Hera have some sort of domestic disputes

Fool me once Zeus. Shame on you. Fool me twice. Shame on me. Fool me 20+ times. Well shit....

At 11/6/08 05:39 PM, 36Holla wrote: Fool me once Zeus. Shame on you. Fool me twice. Shame on me. Fool me 20+ times. Well shit....

It's more like 120. Zeus is the man.

Bow chika wow wow

<3 Greek mythology. I get to take it after Christmas. Can't wait now!

Rocks + Sex = Epic

At 11/6/08 05:42 PM, Rosenrot-I wrote:

At 11/6/08 05:39 PM, 36Holla wrote: Fool me once Zeus. Shame on you. Fool me twice. Shame on me. Fool me 20+ times. Well shit....

It's more like 120. Zeus is the man.

Sorry this is only an introductory class. We don't have the time to go into all of his affairs. :(

My Language Arts is about greek mythology. We never talk about anything else. Almost.

To sum up Zeus as briefly as possibly.

Zeus is an omnipotent badass who rapes countless women in the forms of random animals for fun and smites anyone who questions him.

Moral of the story, your children will betray you.

So go have sex with a rock.

I wish I could have sex with a rock.

This only proves that drugs are nowhere near new.

...I'm a primitive ancestry, who stood on rocky shores
and kept your beaches ship-wreck free.
And though I respect that a lot,
I'd be fired it that were my job
after killing Jason off
and countless screaming Argonauts

Oh fuck yah, gotta get me some of that hawt Greek Mythology...

Fuck yes.

thats the weirdest stuff ive ever heard they were freaks

What's up with the greeks obsession with genitals and sex?

At 11/6/08 03:35 PM, Nikenick wrote: I wish I could fuck a rock 15 times or get pregnant.

Hey baby, why don't you come over here and see what happens?

mythology and other older religions are great fun, you should look at Norse mythology.

although, to the OP, if you're religious in some way... frankly man, you cant really call these ridiculous

Yeah, well, you're gay holla. K? K.

At 11/6/08 11:02 PM, Panzer-Wolf wrote: What's up with the greeks obsession with genitals and sex?

Obsession? I don't see how they're any more obsessed than, say, me.
...
._.

oh.

At 11/7/08 12:46 AM, Shauna wrote: Yeah, well, you're gay holla. K? K.

What the fuck are you even doing here anymore? I would have thought by your inactivity that you had forgotten your account password by now, but apparently an elephant sometimes remembers. Also you're not an elephant. Shut up!

At 11/7/08 12:42 AM, DiscoveryOne wrote: although, to the OP, if you're religious in some way... frankly man, you cant really call these ridiculous

What the hell are you talking about? I totally believe that an invisible man is watching and judging my every move and my actions decide whether or not I get to live in a great afterlife. I also know that if I say any bad words against him I will be smited down in an instant....but he loves me.

yeah I've listened to some George Carlin. Just SOME.

wow seems like the religions now..

WAY TO IGNORE ME JERKFACE ALSO CHECK MY BLOG JEFF.

I love how Zeus was the original pimp.
He raped and fucked them hoes left right, and fucking center....
At the same time.

At 11/6/08 03:08 PM, poxpower wrote: And it doesn't end there with those people. They have crazy explanations for everything. Why strawberries are red, where wine comes from, why chickens can't fly. On and on.

What about the Australian Aboriginal tale of how Kangaroos got their tails? Apparently they've been spending all eternity with spears stuck up their arses... >_>

At 11/6/08 03:08 PM, poxpower wrote: And it doesn't end there with those people. They have crazy explanations for everything...where wine comes from

The recipe for wine was given to Icarius by the God of Wine and Temporary Disorder Dionysus. Icarius decided to invite his neighbors over to test out the new beverage but he forgot to dilute it with water. He and his neighbors still drink and get really drunk. The next morning, the neighbors wake up with hangovers but think that Icarius tried to poison them so they hang him. When Dionysus finds this out, he makes all the daughters of the neighbors hang themselves...

and everyone lived happily ever after.

hey honey, its me Zeus; i can't make it home today, i'm too busy having sexx with mortal wemon- I MEAN, DOING VERY IMPORTANT....yeah i'm having sex with mortal wemon...i'm sorry, i said i'd stop but...well yeah, be back soon.

At 11/6/08 05:00 PM, Idiot-Finder wrote: Zeus is kind of like Bill Clinton if you know what I mean

"i did NOT have. sexual. relations. with that mortal.

==next week==

Greece, i have not been entirly truthful with you, i DID, have sex with that mortal, and i'm sorry."

Actually, I think the first one isn't Greek at all. But there is a related story of creation about penises being chopped off. Gaia, the first goddess (or Titan, if you want to be specific) was simply thrust into life before there was anything else, and in the same manner, she created Ouranous. Gaia and Ouranous had many children, among them a son (yes, mother and son had sex, stop asking questions), and named him Kronos, the Lord of Time. Kronos chopped off Ouranous's genitals with his own blade and threw it in the sea. Obviously, from the blood spilled into the sea (or semen, in some versions) the Cyclopse, Hekatonkheires, and other monsters were created.
Then, when Kronos was the supreme ruler of the universe, had sex with her sister, Rhea (stop asking questions, goddammit!) and had six children. Kronos, afraid his children would overpowered him, ate them, but Rhea fed Kronos a rock instead of the sixth child (Zeus) and when Zeus grew older, he fed Kronos a poison that would cause him to vomit all five of his children, still alive.

At 5/6/10 10:43 PM, Xmenace wrote: Zeus grew older, he fed Kronos a poison that would cause him to vomit all five of his children, still alive.

That makes sense, seeing as how Gods are immortal, NO MATTER FUCKING WHAT. The Gods, now free, and now suddenly sporting the ability to use their powers to the fullest extent and wearing full body armor, would go on to chop Kronos into a million fucking pieces, sweep them up into a dust pan, and throw them down a fucking hole (Tartarus). However, Kronos, being immortal, was still alive, and had to suffer eternal agony, equivalent, to, well, being cut into pieces but not dieing.

Zeus = Memetic omnimolester. JERKASS.
Hera = Miss Queen bitch
Athena = Mary Sue, morally ambiguous
Hermes = Trickster
Hephastheus = Cripple genius, tragic story
Hades = Not a bad guy
Dionysus = God of WINE
Ares = Jerk Jock crybaby
Poseidon = Good guy sometimes, fucks stuff, fathers a monster occasionally.
Artemis = Amazon
Apolo = Bishounen

What a bunch.