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At 8/19/08 12:14 PM, Scuzzfest wrote: Cuntface has blabbed that I launched him headfirst into the pole. Said I piledrived him into it and rubbed glass in his face.

Next time you should actually do that so at least he won't be lying when he bitches to his mom. Or just kill him. He's only 12, not like it matters. They would probably give you a community service award.

By the way, I like snickers; I read it because there's nothing else to do; Where the fuck is my medal? :D

100th post.

too long and i didn't read it.

Well I wouldn't worry about the 20 year olds because if they hit you they are going to get some jail time. So really all you have to worry about is anyone under 18 , so I think you have a fair chance if anything goes down.

Snickers

You handled this situation very professionally. I mean, yeah. You're still kind of fucked, but there's a distinct chance that in two weeks nobody's going to remember this

The 20 year olds can't get you at school, right?

At 8/19/08 12:59 PM, Chao14 wrote: kockpiece

Seconded.

Have you explained what happened to your mom yet? I'd advise doing that because cuntface will more than likely continually lie and add more AIDS to the story. Great read btw.

I wasn't introduced to candy until I was five so I don't really have a favorite, but I do enjoy a nestle crunch here and there.

Wow, that was a great read I must say and you told it so well.

1. Reese's Pieces
2. You dialed 999? Not 911?

Oh I got some more news about cuntface's mum, She doesn't believe fuck all what he said. He's already a nightmare to them, Apparently I knocked some sense into him and he's all fucked up now because the police have added this to his previous attempts at nicking people's bikes whether sucessful or unsucessful.

I do see the irony that had cuntface and dicklips not tried to get a gang of thugs and chavs on me, Then cuntface would not of got in any trouble at all because the police wouldn't of been involved. Just goes to show you should handle situations yourself.

At 8/19/08 01:07 PM, The-Great-One wrote: Wow, that was a great read I must say and you told it so well.

1. Reese's Pieces
2. You dialed 999? Not 911?

999 is the UK emergency call number.
And thankyou, I do enjoy writing long detailed stories. Might even do some more writing one day.

i had close to the same problem once i had beaten up a kid younger than me (yes i did it on perpose) for being a prick after i had knocked 10 sorts of shit out of him he calls his brother who just got out of jail but nothing happened i just told the bother "if his dad won't beat him i will" and he fucked off

Just bring a knife or something.

Cant be that hard.

In a fight were the odds are so bad that you could get killed, get a weapon. A gun would work best because you wouldn't have to even use it (just show it off). Kill or be killed. The correct answer is obvious.

Also, I don't really have a favorite candy.

At 8/18/08 07:50 PM, Shreddy wrote:

At 8/18/08 07:49 PM, cardboredknight wrote: http://cgi.ebay.com/20-MACHETE-low-glare -black-tool-knife-hunting-w-sheath_W0QQi temZ280255588544QQihZ018QQcategoryZ75234 QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

anyone else reckon Wade has put a bid in for this?

Nah, he'll own it in three colours anyway.

Great story, too bad I dislike most candy. If you insist though, Reeses pwn.

You should write more lol. Go attack someone else, this makes good literature.

P.S. I'm glad it worked out ok, and make sure next time to go home and get a mask first.

You're kinda fucked up
You should stay inside for a long time and try avoiding them
Get a pepper spray just in case you encounter some of them

As many people have jokingly suggested wearing a mask anyother time I do this. Thinking of wearing a V for vendetta guy fawkes mask if I ever have to deal with someone.... get a machete and a gun, hell I could be the next serial killer.

At 8/18/08 06:04 PM, Thechickensparta wrote: why did you dial 999?

It's the British version of 911.

I read the story, and I'm sorry about those little twats.

I don't quite understand the term "Pikey" or "chav" but I get the jist they're unsavoury characters, right?

Yeha...kids are horrible like that. If I even picked up a 12 year old I'd probably be arrested for kidnapping, assault, a whole other battery of legal terms. But, I'm 23..I should be able to defend myself against a 12 y/o w/o resorting to violence.

I'd have just been spitting on him until he left...hocking HUGE loogies in his hair and eyes.

Good thing you got that little cuntface with a big friggin pole. :)
He had it coming.

well now the only way you will feel secure is if u become a hitman....and kill cuntface and dicklips...as well as the other chavs

Man, i used to hate you but man, you've got balls.

And perhaps a twix, chew it over with a fucking twix. bitch

i read it all.

I'm sitting here, eating a Snickers bar because it's so chewy and delicious and I come across this. Good stuff. Hopefully you don't get your ass kicked.

OMG, the solution is too simple.

Bring an RPG

lolz jk

I want my medal by the way.
I don't eat sweets, srsly. >:D

Bwing a baseball bat

I suggest Investing in some Big friends to back you up if shit goes down man.
Try talking to one of them and getting the situation all settled out.

snickers FTW.

:yep, Took 5 minutes but i read it all. :D

At 8/19/08 07:31 PM, Armerad wrote: Man, i used to hate you but man, you've got balls.

And perhaps a twix, chew it over with a fucking twix. bitch

i read it all.

Why did you hate me lmao.
Cheers, I had the balls to sprint nonstop from a bunch of druggies with knives.... Doesn't sound that heroic unfortunately... smart but not heroic.

Also to others who don't know British lingo to well, English street lingo 101:

1) Chav: Council house anti social villian aka. Anyone who wears teacksuits and is a menace to the communtiy.

2) Pikey: Someone who stereotypically lives in a caravan/mobile home and nicks and steals stuff for a living.

I feel pretty sorry for you, but it was a awesome story and I read all of it. :3

It would have been a lot cooler if your dad opened the door with a shot gun and shot them in the knees, but there you go..

Also, Rolo's.. I think.. :P

At 8/18/08 06:07 PM, GHOST-KILLA wrote:

At 8/18/08 06:04 PM, Thechickensparta wrote: why did you dial 999?

thats a pretty fuckin retarded thing to ask

i just asumed every1 knew the difference

im strongly offended by that.
i didnt know that europeans call 999.
it was very wrong of you to assume this.

Shit man, sounds like quite a day you had there.
I fucking hate little chav fags who think theyre hard >:(

Galaxy, Because dairy milk is for fags :]

Waaay too long, but I read it, all of it. :O

Yea anyways I recommend you just lay low for a while.

I dive into the living room where my sister is panting...

Best fucking typo EVER.

I read it all :3

Maybe the chavs will forget, or maybe the little 12yr olds will have something sugary and pass out after the high wears off...