R.i.p. Common Sense

[Dgp15]

Obituary of Common Sense. Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student, but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three newly found relatives: I Know my Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm a Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

[Arby]

mmmm copy pasta

[All-American-Badass]

this is older than john mccain

[Wrote]

At 7/14/08 02:58 PM, All-American-Badass wrote: this is older than john mccain

this is funny becasue John McCain is old.

[Mr-Contradiction]

Altogether a lovely story to read.

However, it is inherently false. There is an underground system of people still operating under the rules that Common Sense put forth, dodging the law and mobs of media whores while trying to live a normal life...

[Homosecksual]

RIP, You will be barely mist.

C WUT I DID THAR?

[killerjeff]

I'm wanting pasta.

[MrLuckDuck]

Yummy, delicious pasta.

[NinjasAreBetter]

Yesrday, I opened up a pair of scissors and proceded to move my left thumb up and down the blade, not realizing how bad an idea this was, I now have 3 cuts on my left thumb.

R.I.P. Common sense

[Dgp15]

At 7/14/08 02:58 PM, Arby wrote: mmmm copy pasta

Yeah, but i felt that the BBS might find it funny.

And though it may be old, is it any less true?

[HaniiPuppy]

I miss the days when a burglar couldn't sue the person they were burgling for falling on a knife while the owner was asleep, or when people actually knew the official reason why they went to war, or when being part of a minority didn't make you nearly invulnerable in the courts while almost certain to get picked up on the streets, or when if someone was sitting with their guts spilling onto the road, someone would help them instead of just walking past thinking "someone else will help them."

Tis a sad story, common sense shall be missed.

[robattle]

At 7/14/08 02:58 PM, Arby wrote: mmmm copy pasta

How do you know that?

Common sense when I tell someone to jump off a cliff they shouldn't. When you fill a lawsuit don't do it for no reason. The news isn't always correct.

[HaniiPuppy]

Although, maybe it isn't all bad. Now, thanks to common sense being gone, the majority of criminals post videos of themselves committing the crimes on youtube for anyone to find, or leave clues as to it being them as though they thought they were living in an episode of Scooby Doo.

[Prinzy2]

Great, now who am I going to beat when I have a bad day at work?

[Dgp15]

At 7/14/08 03:18 PM, Fyndir wrote: A bunch of anti-religious crap that has nothing to with this thread.

If you are not smart enough to look past one line you disagree with in order to see the bigger picture, please be irritating on another thread.

[St1cki3]

he died..?? since when...?!?..did he have a disease or was he shot....?

[igott]

i blame betty.

[ThePretenders]

That's not common sense. It's retarded social conservatism.

Oh wait, it's the same thing.

[Mr-Contradiction]

At 7/14/08 03:43 PM, Fyndir wrote: That line tainted the rest of your post with agenda pushing bullshit.

Now now, be nice, he was just serving some copy-pasta...

[kindmortal]

At 7/14/08 02:59 PM, Wrote wrote:

At 7/14/08 02:58 PM, All-American-Badass wrote: this is older than john mccain

this is funny becasue John McCain is old.

This is funny because I'm slow.