Meeting My Girlfriend's Family Tmw

[Mr-President]

It consists of her mother, father and little brother. My goal is to have them like me, and to not mind me being with their daughter.

So knowing Newgrounds, with members that give the most prestigious advice on the internet, I humbly ask:

What questions are they likely to ask, and how should I answer these questions? Also, what should I say? Anything specific to know about?

Thanks Newgrounds! You're the best!

[Ungar]

"I will try to have sex with your daughter as much as possible."

[RobotTaco]

At 7/5/08 05:24 AM, Mr-President wrote:

Thanks Newgrounds! You're the best!

I am? I AM?! Oh wow, this warms my heart!

But in all seriousness, just spew a load of bullshit. It helped me survive being in a Psych Ward, it sure as hell can help you!

[Benovere]

At 7/5/08 05:24 AM, Mr-President wrote: It consists of her mother, father and little brother. My goal is to have them like me, and to not mind me being with their daughter.

You might want to remove the little bro out of the equation if you can.

So knowing Newgrounds, with members that give the most prestigious advice on the internet, I humbly ask:

Lol

What questions are they likely to ask, and how should I answer these questions? Also, what should I say? Anything specific to know about?

1. Do not touch her in front of her parents, at all.
2. Do not tell them that your baby is inside of her
3. Do not make cockjokes
4. Do not whip it out, they wont be impressed
5. Do not say that their daughter is sexy
6. Do not fart
7. Do not admit to what you dont have to
8. As far as they are concerned, your goal in life is to go through college, earn a medical degree, and be a doctor.
9. You are not funny
I hope that helped

Thanks Newgrounds! You're the best!

You are welcome

[TheNossinator]

At 7/5/08 05:25 AM, Ungar wrote: "I will try to have sex with your daughter as much as possible."

Way to spoil a serious Q and A session.

But seriously, if you feel the need to lie, do it. Just don't overdo it.
But only when you feel you need to.

Otherwise, be yourself. If they can't accept that, you're going to have a loooong life with them.

[evilXbanana]

At 7/5/08 05:29 AM, RobotTaco wrote:

At 7/5/08 05:24 AM, Mr-President wrote:

Thanks Newgrounds! You're the best!

I am? I AM?! Oh wow, this warms my heart!

But in all seriousness, just spew a load of bullshit. It helped me survive being in a Psych Ward, it sure as hell can help you!

insanity aside, this man is right. Meeting the parents is basically like going out on a date with her parents. You have to create common ground while making them feel appreciated and respected.

Lie your ass off.

[JaY11]

Okay, they will definitely ask about your penis size, so it's best to tell them before they ask, that way they will respect you more.

Believe me, I'm a pro at this kind of thing.

[Vince50]

"Why do you think you're right for our daughter?"

Can you answer that?

[Hornby]

At 7/5/08 05:50 AM, Vince50 wrote: "Why do you think you're right for our daughter?"

Can you answer that?

because you're daughter is an ugly whore who will have no one else

easy enough

[evilXbanana]

At 7/5/08 05:50 AM, Vince50 wrote: "Why do you think you're right for our daughter?"

Can you answer that?

"Because I don't treat our relationship like a business interview"

Honestly there are much harder questions relating to your future that are a much bigger pain in the dick to BS.

[citricsquid]

At 7/5/08 05:50 AM, Vince50 wrote: "Why do you think you're right for our daughter?"

Can you answer that?

"Because we love each other."

[DareDevilGuy]

Here comes some cliché advice:

Be yourself, but be polite. That's basically it. At least one of her parents will not like you, no matter what. Try to focus your attention on the one who seems nice or neutral to you and win her/him over by being a polite young man. If they both seem to dislike you, tough luck, but stay polite.

Did I mention you should be fucking polite?

[JaY11]

Oh and always be the guy to offer the handshake to the parents (good first impression).

[jaammiie]

At 7/5/08 06:02 AM, Bobbyballer wrote: just say

"yo bitches how u been ballin"

so dey go all lyke

"checkity-check-check dis hoe!!1!"

and den u have orgy

Correct! Round one to Bobbyballer

[ChriZZu]

well um :D Just shake theyr hands and look into the eyes and be yourself... should work ^^

[ChriZZu]

well um :D Just shake theyr hands and look into the eyes and be yourself... should work ^^

[bigjuicy]

"Hey, your daughter's got some jugs on her huh?" in a New york accent.

[Mr-President]

Wow a lot of you guys's advice is priceless!

Thanks Newgrounds!

[CapnCrunchDaPimp]

Whatever you do, don't try too hard.

[MRSA]

dont touch her in front of them. It's already annoying enough in high school hallways, but in front of parents it gives a really bad impression. Be humble, and if they ask you about your future and stuff, if you're not heading down a good road, lie.

[KL3]

At 7/5/08 06:02 AM, Bobbyballer wrote: just say

"yo bitches how u been ballin"

so dey go all lyke

"checkity-check-check dis hoe!!1!"

and den u have orgy

That's exactly how it went when Michael met my parents.

[bigGUNZ]

At 7/5/08 05:29 AM, Benovere wrote:

2. Do not tell them that your baby is inside of her

lol the one about the baby is really funny...otherwise... yeah, good advice ;)

[Biscuit-Boy]

It all depends on how much you like the girl and how long you want to be with her.

If you really like her, and want to have a... SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP... then follow the good advice given and don't fuck up.

If you just like her enough to get into her pants, then maybe you shouldn't try so hard. You can crack some jokes at the little brother's expense and get away with it. Don't insult the parents, but you don't have to wow them either.

If you plan on dumping her ASAP, then... well do as you please. You can break the little twerps arm and make fun of him for it! Fart as you please and piss in their closet. Hell, you can try to get a threesome going with the mom and your gf if you really don't care. To top it off, I would start setting things on fire as I left.

So now you have three options for the three levels of relationships!

Your welcome.

[Prinzy2]

Don't speak unless you have something really good to say, or you are answering a question.
Also, shake both the father's and mother's hands. Seems a little weird, but it's worked so far.
Try and talk about something you have in common whether it be sports, mechanics, current events, but don't talk about anything touchy.

One more thing, try and get a feeling about them before you try to fit in.

[darknessdweller]

Just keep your cool, don't talk w/ your mouth open, don't say anything embaressing,
and DON'T mention sex or marriage. That might scare her parents.

[CombatSnow]

Don't ever be TOO nice, that makes you look like a pussy in front of your girlfriend and her parents. ALways open the door for her or her parents if your in that situation. Always be humble about what you like to do and joke around now and then with your girlfriend, an innocent joke not like.. (ok little miss big tits.) you say and its over.. Dont ever touch her and always try to have more convo with them over your girlfriend. Hope that helped.

[TiiBag]

At 7/5/08 01:37 PM, darknessdweller wrote: don't talk w/ your mouth open

Shit that's gonna be a hard one.

[Mr-President]

Thanks so much guys!

I've also got another question, guys: Her parents are or were hippies, are ultra liberal, and are intellectuals. I realize this doesn't change the basic advice, but my question is: would I still be able to discuss friendly politics with them, or is this considered an exceedingly touchy subject that I shouldn't get to?

[RacistBassist]

Pretend to be deaf

[Mr-President]

At 7/5/08 02:22 PM, RacistBassist wrote: Pretend to be deaf

My parents are deaf, so that can't be too hard.

But why?