Alright, NG, I need some help. Allow me to explain my situation.
It started just a few nights ago. I had taken my girlfriend out to see Wall-E and we had just entered the theatre when my first problem arose. You see, my girlfriend is a very attractive girl, and unfortunately we were seated next of two guys, one of whom kept panting and staring at my girlfriend. He was a rather heavy guy with a noticable bit of acne and thick rimmed glasses. Throughout the previews he kept inching his head closer and closer to my girlfriend, presumably to get a better look at her.
My girlfriend was very uncomfortable with all this, so eventually I asked the guy calmly and quietly to please leave her alone. He responds rather loudly, "Fuck you, this is America, I can do what I want!" Still calm, I told him that she was getting uncomfortable. Now the guy next to him says to me, "Hey, dude, let my friend do what he wants, alright?" Knowing I couldn't reason with either of them, I switched seats with my girlfriend, and this seemed to anger the staring guy. He punched my shoulder and said, "Hey shitfuck, switch back, I can't get a good look at your bitch from here!" Angry now, I told him to fuck off, and he responds, "Fine, after the movie, I'm gonna kick your ass!"
Roughly two hours later, as we were leaving the theatre, the guy and his friend confronted us as we were heading to my car. He immediately takes a swing at me, which I avoid rather easily. I'm not the confrontational type, so I didn't actually try to fight so much as avoid all his attacks. Eventually he gets pissed and says, "Fight back you faggot!" I then respond, "No, you're too pathetic to waste my energy on." He gets even angrier and says, "Pathetic? PATHETIC?! YOU'RE IN FOR IT NOW, COCKSUCKER! I'LL SHOW YOU WHO'S PATHETIC!"
His body suddenly shifted and began to morph, larger and larger, until his true form was revealed. I had unknowningly been fighting the human avatar of the dread demon Zal'Curuth, and now his wrath had descended upon my city. Knowing that this was the day of prophecy, I pulled the holy dagger Skittis from the hidden sheath on my back, and immediately sprung into action. I hacked and slashed at his body, but every slash immediately healed. Zal'Curuth laughed horribly at my feeble efforts, but I pressed on. Eventually I came to a sore on his spine, one that stuck out like a pimple. I stabbed this sore and Zal'Curuth screamed out in pain.
As dark goo spewed from the wound, I saw a small black lump, no larger than my fist, and I realized this was the demon's dark heart, which i began to hack and slash at. Zal'Curuth kept trying to reach me, but I had the protection of the elders on my side, and with one final stab, the dark heart exploded, causing Zal'Curuth to wither and die. As he grew smaller and weaker, I grabbed his head and cut it off so he could not be reborn in the world of man. Skittis in one hand and the demon's head in the other, I turned around to find my girlfriend had left with the guys friend.
What do I do?