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Are you as truly badass as you say?

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Scalene
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Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:40:01 Reply

Guys, here's a test. We're going to see if Newgrounders really do the things that they say they do.

So, here are some questions, that, really, only someone who has experience in the field would be able to answer.

Drinking.
Oh, so you drink underage? Let's see.
1. How did you get access to the alcohol?
2. If you bought it, what did you buy, how did you buy it, and how much was it?
3. How much did you drink, and what happened as a result?
4. Were you hungover? What did it feel like, and how did you get over it?
5. Where were you when you did it, and where did you go afterwards?

Drugs.
We'll start low, then go to the most hardcore ones. I only ask these questions out of what I've been told, I refuse to touch drugs. First, weed.
1. How much did you buy, and how much was it?
2. What was the taste like?
3. How did you smoke it, and what did you look and smell like afterwards?
4. What effect did it have? If you hurt yourself, what happened? If you watched something, how was it different?

Oh, so you've tried ecstasy. Then you'll definitely be able to answer these questions.
1. Where'd you get it?
2. How much was it?
3. What was the design?
4. How did it change the way you acted?
5. What did you really really want when you took it?
6. What's it taste like?

I'm know only a little about drugs, but only a druggie should be able to answer those questions.

And finally, the big one...

Sex.
We'll start with the basis - the 'girl' you're dating.
1. How long have you been dating?
2. What's her birthday?
3. What's her starsign?
4. Last name?
5. What point is she at in her cycle?

Oral sex. Only a couple of questions needed to establish this...
1. Which blowjob sent you through the roof (the really mind-blowing one)?
2. What's pussy taste like?

Finally, normal sex.
1. What's near the top of a vag, what's lower down, and where does the cawk go?
2. What brand and size condom do you use, and how much are they?
3. If it was the girl's first time, what did you need? And what would she keep doing?
4. And finally - how long did it take you to get off?

I just get sick of people making mistakes in their posts that so obviously prove that they're bullshitting. Like, "I smoked an entire pipe of weed. I was totally bouncing off the ceiling for the rest of the night, but now my head hurts." Ta, NG.
Deadchick
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:43:44 Reply

Yep, I'm not a badass, I never tried none of that. Don't even want to try the drugs and alcohol parts.

sex on the other hand....
TheJamoke
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:43:44 Reply

I enjoy the fact that I'm old and do not have to answer these questions to prove anything to anyone.


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Lagatag
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:44:08 Reply

I'm too fucking badass to answer those questions!


bro at me come

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DevourerJay
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:50:03 Reply

At 6/30/08 01:43 AM, Deadchick wrote: sex on the other hand....

lol a virgin...

hey g.! :P

DevourerJay~Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
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beeryayghost
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:52:14 Reply

I did all of those things, but I promised mother I wouldn't tell anyone the details.


Dicks

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tomato-soup
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:53:29 Reply

Don't do drugs, kiddies.


Your a scientist. Yes, you.
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Me-Patch
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 01:57:13 Reply

At 6/30/08 01:40 AM, Scalene wrote: Drinking.
Oh, so you drink underage? Let's see.
1. How did you get access to the alcohol?

Back in the Day: Rade liquor cabinets, my dads left over keg bottoms, the old heads at the gas station, and the 20 yearolds that charge a little extra.

These Days: My freind bobby, my freind Jesse, my freind Laura, you know what I could just go on this way.

2. If you bought it, what did you buy, how did you buy it, and how much was it?

40s of hurricane are only 1.80 so they are popular, cases af Natty are only 17-18 bucks, Big ass 1 liters of cheap vodka are only like 15. etc..

3. How much did you drink, and what happened as a result?

I don't drink until I get on the floor drunk very often anymore, It's more manly to hold your shit togethor.

4. Were you hungover? What did it feel like, and how did you get over it?

Drink lots of water and sometimes eat perks. Also eggs.

5. Where were you when you did it, and where did you go afterwards?

The woods, the playground, the train station, and the occasional basement. Then my own place, then I went to jail, now in my parents house.

Drugs.
We'll start low, then go to the most hardcore ones. I only ask these questions out of what I've been told, I refuse to touch drugs. First, weed.
1. How much did you buy, and how much was it?

A half O I can get for 50, a full O for 90, good shit too. Thats also a damn good price.

2. What was the taste like?

Like weed.

3. How did you smoke it, and what did you look and smell like afterwards?

I'm smokin right now out of a wooden bowl that says Dr.Grabow-Bucko on it. I Iook hi.

4. What effect did it have? If you hurt yourself, what happened? If you watched something, how was it different?

You just get dumb and mellow and think your smarter.

Oh, so you've tried ecstasy. Then you'll definitely be able to answer these questions.
1. Where'd you get it?

Only did it twice off of some girl

2. How much was it?

20 a pill

3. What was the design?

Green playboy bunny.

4. How did it change the way you acted?

not much. just made me happy as fuck

5. What did you really really want when you took it?

Cocain

6. What's it taste like?

You swallow it. I cracked mine first.

I'm know only a little about drugs, but only a druggie should be able to answer those questions.

And finally, the big one...

Sex.
We'll start with the basis - the 'girl' you're dating.
1. How long have you been dating?

three weeks

2. What's her birthday?

december something

3. What's her starsign?

capricorn same as mine.

4. Last name?

McDevitt

5. What point is she at in her cycle?

Don't worry about it.

Oral sex. Only a couple of questions needed to establish this...
1. Which blowjob sent you through the roof (the really mind-blowing one)?

None. I only cum from sex.

2. What's pussy taste like?

Like pussy.

Finally, normal sex.
1. What's near the top of a vag, what's lower down, and where does the cawk go?

Top = Yes, Bottom = No. I still have trouble with that last part sometimes to this day.

2. What brand and size condom do you use, and how much are they?

I don't. Thats right.

3. If it was the girl's first time, what did you need? And what would she keep doing?

I don't even want to answer that one.

4. And finally - how long did it take you to get off?

Varies, I'm a superman though.


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poster007
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:00:22 Reply

I didn't do any of those =P.

Me-Patch
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:06:49 Reply

I'll thank you to admit that I'm a badass now.


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Scalene
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:11:06 Reply

At 6/30/08 02:06 AM, Me-Patch wrote his test results

No, you failed the test. Sorry!

Me-Patch
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:12:26 Reply

At 6/30/08 02:11 AM, Scalene wrote: At 6/30/08 02:06 AM, Me-Patch wrote his test results

No, you failed the test. Sorry!

Yeah alright. I've done so many things you don't even know about.


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Kidlazarus
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:12:55 Reply

I'm too badass to not delete one of your crappy flash reviews.
Or answer this quiz.
I'm just badass enough to post on this forum.

dearion
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:14:09 Reply

I don't have to prove shit to you. You're still in highschool.

ss4chepu
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:16:29 Reply

dont take drugs
take beer


i'm right ur wrong coz im king of the world

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Me-Patch
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 02:20:58 Reply

At 6/30/08 02:11 AM, Scalene wrote: At 6/30/08 02:06 AM, Me-Patch wrote his test results

No, you failed the test. Sorry!

No this is getting to me. What did I get wrong? Maybe I need to nerd it down a little for you or something.


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SILKS
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 03:03:11 Reply

i am 60 % badass.


kirby the king

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DevourerJay
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 03:06:13 Reply

looks like i am... lol


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Odio
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 03:19:55 Reply

A real bad-ass is more concerned about other things than some shit on the BBS. Bad-asses don't give two shits about the BBS. Or the Internet for that matter. But because I was bored, I thought I would give this a Shot. Not because I'm trying to prove I'm a bad ass, I know I am, but because I thought I'd throw the OP a Bone.

Drinking.
1. How did you get access to the alcohol?

That's nothing for you to know.

2. If you bought it, what did you buy, how did you buy it, and how much was it?

Fuck you.

3. How much did you drink, and what happened as a result?

I stabbed a Guy.

4. Were you hungover? What did it feel like, and how did you get over it?

Fuck you.

5. Where were you when you did it, and where did you go afterwards?

Fuck you.

Drugs.
1. How much did you buy, and how much was it?

Suck my Dick.

2. What was the taste like?

Your Mother.

3. How did you smoke it, and what did you look and smell like afterwards?

Bite me.

4. What effect did it have? If you hurt yourself, what happened? If you watched something, how was it different?

I stabbed a Guy.

Oh, so you've tried ecstasy.
1. Where'd you get it?

Doggy dropped it.

2. How much was it?

The same price as your Sister.

3. What was the design?

Get raped.

4. How did it change the way you acted?

I stabbed a Guy.

5. What did you really really want when you took it?

For you to shut up.

6. What's it taste like?

Kill yourself.

Sex.
We'll start with the basis - the 'girl' you're dating.
1. How long have you been dating?

Dating is for Pussies.

2. What's her birthday?

Real men are Swingers.

3. What's her starsign?

Plus, my Sex Life is none of your concern.

4. Last name?

First name?

5. What point is she at in her cycle?

What kind of stalkerish question is that?

Oral sex. Only a couple of questions needed to establish this...
1. Which blowjob sent you through the roof (the really mind-blowing one)?

You are dumb.

2. What's pussy taste like?

Fuck you. Hard.

Finally, normal sex.
1. What's near the top of a vag, what's lower down, and where does the cawk go?

Butt Plug.

2. What brand and size condom do you use, and how much are they?

Butt Plug.

3. If it was the girl's first time, what did you need? And what would she keep doing?

Butt Plug.

4. And finally - how long did it take you to get off?

Butt Plug.


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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 03:28:48 Reply

At 6/30/08 01:40 AM, Scalene wrote: Guys, here's a test. We're going to see if Newgrounders really do the things that they say they do.

So, here are some questions, that, really, only someone who has experience in the field would be able to answer.

Drinking.
Oh, so you drink underage? Let's see.
1. How did you get access to the alcohol?

older friends.

2. If you bought it, what did you buy, how did you buy it, and how much was it?

eh.

3. How much did you drink, and what happened as a result?

I got drunk, puked a lot.

4. Were you hungover? What did it feel like, and how did you get over it?

Yes, I slept all day and ate some food, threw up more.. took pain killers.

5. Where were you when you did it, and where did you go afterwards?

Eh, I was at my best friends house while her grandparents were out of town, We went out to eat the next morning, I bought chocolate milk which made my puke a lot.


Drugs.
We'll start low, then go to the most hardcore ones. I only ask these questions out of what I've been told, I refuse to touch drugs. First, weed.
1. How much did you buy, and how much was it?
2. What was the taste like?
3. How did you smoke it, and what did you look and smell like afterwards?
4. What effect did it have? If you hurt yourself, what happened? If you watched something, how was it different?

I don't do teh drugz.


Oh, so you've tried ecstasy. Then you'll definitely be able to answer these questions.
1. Where'd you get it?
2. How much was it?
3. What was the design?
4. How did it change the way you acted?
5. What did you really really want when you took it?
6. What's it taste like?

Noooope.

I'm know only a little about drugs, but only a druggie should be able to answer those questions.

And finally, the big one...

Sex.
We'll start with the basis - the 'girl' you're dating.
1. How long have you been dating?

1 year & almost 5 months.

2. What's her birthday?

July 20th

3. What's her starsign?

Cancer. (his)

4. Last name?

It's something on a tree, hint.

5. What point is she at in her cycle?

He doesn't have a vagina..

Oral sex. Only a couple of questions needed to establish this...
1. Which blowjob sent you through the roof (the really mind-blowing one)?

Ask him.

2. What's pussy taste like?

Wouldn't know.

Finally, normal sex.
1. What's near the top of a vag, what's lower down, and where does the cawk go?

:( ask questions a GIRL could answer abotu a dude. *sigh.

2. What brand and size condom do you use, and how much are they?
3. If it was the girl's first time, what did you need? And what would she keep doing?

Yawn.

4. And finally - how long did it take you to get off?

the first time took a while, I say almost a hour, his friend walked in on us and all.

I just get sick of people making mistakes in their posts that so obviously prove that they're bullshitting. Like, "I smoked an entire pipe of weed. I was totally bouncing off the ceiling for the rest of the night, but now my head hurts." Ta, NG.

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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 03:48:17 Reply

this was a very crafty way to figure out how to get all of that done on your own.. ha.


.

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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:10:57 Reply

I don't care what anyone thinks. I'm actually more badass than I say.

Try wrapping you brains around that one.


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Link24l
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:12:56 Reply

everyone says im more bad ass than i say so no im not as bad ass as i say

Rosenrot-I
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:25:18 Reply

That is the stupidest thing ever. Any idiot could make all of those up and there is no way for you to check. Ergo, this thread is useless.


There is nothing you can name that is more delicious and awesome than Subway.
I run on Mountain Dew.

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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:33:31 Reply

Fuck your test. I have 11 children captive in my basement proving I'm badass.


"It isn't that democrats are ignorant. Far from it. it's just that they know so much that just isn't so"
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:35:22 Reply

What about fights?
How big was the person/s?
They were all around my hieght and 2 were tinny

How often do you fight?
Lots

Do you use weapons? (this is good or bad depending on 4)
No well if they arent to deadly

Do you make "sure" you won?
Most of the time if it was a fued

Are you generaly not around people who fight? (this shows ur bad by birth)
Yah ecept for a kid who thinks he bad ass(hes not)

When the last time you faught?
Just 3 days ago

Do you always win?(be honest)
Scence i was like 7 and even then it was pretty close

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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:36:06 Reply

Drinking.
Oh, so you drink underage? Let's see.
1. How did you get access to the alcohol? Took it from parents hiding spot
2. If you bought it, what did you buy, how did you buy it, and how much was it? didnt buy it
3. How much did you drink, and what happened as a result? not much, only got a buzz last time
4. Were you hungover? What did it feel like, and how did you get over it? nope
5. Where were you when you did it, and where did you go afterwards? home, went to k-mart

Drugs.
We'll start low, then go to the most hardcore ones. I only ask these questions out of what I've been told, I refuse to touch drugs. First, weed.
1. How much did you buy, and how much was it? an ounce, 110 bucks
2. What was the taste like? good
3. How did you smoke it, and what did you look and smell like afterwards? i sold it, i dont do drugs
4. What effect did it have? If you hurt yourself, what happened? If you watched something, how was it different? well the guy that did do it was seeing stuff cause it was laced, and he almost walked into a huge ditch

I'm know only a little about drugs, but only a druggie should be able to answer those questions.

And finally, the big one...

Sex.

Oral sex. Only a couple of questions needed to establish this...
1. Which blowjob sent you through the roof (the really mind-blowing one)? the ones i got from my last GF. only GF i ever had that could deep throat (out of the ones that would give me head)
2. What's pussy taste like? hard to explain, but sometimes good sometimes bad

Finally, normal sex.
1. What's near the top of a vag, what's lower down, and where does the cawk go? clit, and idk wtf its called, and i dont really care about wtf the rest is called other than pussy
2. What brand and size condom do you use, and how much are they? lifestyle and idk i get em from my bro
3. If it was the girl's first time, what did you need? And what would she keep doing? never done a virgin
4. And finally - how long did it take you to get off? last time was abt half an hour

Rosenrot-I
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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:38:59 Reply

Oh I forgot to add, none of those make you badass. Facial hair does.


There is nothing you can name that is more delicious and awesome than Subway.
I run on Mountain Dew.

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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:47:42 Reply

At 6/30/08 01:40 AM, Scalene wrote:
Drinking.
Oh, so you drink underage? Let's see.
1. How did you get access to the alcohol?

Usually friends, or free at parties

2. If you bought it, what did you buy, how did you buy it, and how much was it?

I'm a sucker for Jager, usually runs me about 20 to 25 bucks depending on who's buying it.

3. How much did you drink, and what happened as a result?

If I drink beer I get a mild buzz, but when I drink vodka I get angry. The morning after my piss usually burns, my lips are dry and I have all kinds of bruises. I don't get bad hangovers.

4. Were you hungover? What did it feel like, and how did you get over it?

Gatorade or Pedilyte. Feels like you want the sun to burn out, and everyone is way too loud. But I eat everything in sight the day after

5. Where were you when you did it, and where did you go afterwards?

Backyard, front yard. kitchen, or living room mostly. If I don't pass out, I'll have my dd take me home.


Drugs.

Never done drugs

Sex.
We'll start with the basis - the 'girl' you're dating.
1. How long have you been dating?

Little over a year

2. What's her birthday?

9/4/87

3. What's her starsign?

I dunno

4. Last name?

I wont say but it rhymes with bertens

5. What point is she at in her cycle?

End of month to beginning. Right around now actually

Oral sex. Only a couple of questions needed to establish this...
1. Which blowjob sent you through the roof (the really mind-blowing one)?

She's really bad at oral

2. What's pussy taste like?

not good, varies from girl to girl, but generally not good


Finally, normal sex.
1. What's near the top of a vag, what's lower down, and where does the cawk go?

The clit,the hole, the hole?

2. What brand and size condom do you use, and how much are they?

birth control

3. If it was the girl's first time, what did you need? And what would she keep doing?

it wasn't

4. And finally - how long did it take you to get off?

too long

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Response to Are you as truly badass as you say? 2008-06-30 04:59:48 Reply

At 6/30/08 01:40 AM, Scalene wrote: Guys, here's a test. We're going to see if Newgrounders really do the things that they say they do.

K, my typing finger is ready to go.

So, here are some questions, that, really, only someone who has experience in the field would be able to answer.

I've had experience in several fields, do your best.

Drinking.
Oh, so you drink underage? Let's see.

Maybe a total of 15ish times?

1. How did you get access to the alcohol?

My first time was a birthday present from my brother. 10th of Smirnoff Vodka.

2. If you bought it, what did you buy, how did you buy it, and how much was it?

See above. I've also tagged along and had my boss pay for a 5th of gin and a Heineken Min-ikeg. The gin was $35 after tax and the mini-keg was bought by somebody else.

3. How much did you drink, and what happened as a result?

I drink very occasionally. First time I just played WoW and chilled with my friend. We acted like morons and sang/filmed ourselves singing.

After that I didn't get drunk again until I was at school a few months later. One of my worst experiences. I skipped a class, showed up late to an other, and puked at my own house in between. I'll never be able to drink tequila again.

4. Were you hungover? What did it feel like, and how did you get over it?

I've been hungover once. At least I think I was, I had a really heavy feeling in my head, but it was just a mild headache. I got over it in a few ours.

I tend to drink water when I'm drunk so I don't get hung over the next morning.

5. Where were you when you did it, and where did you go afterwards?

First time I stayed in my friend's basement.

One time when I went to a failed LAN party I ended up getting sick (again) and we walked around the neighborhood like 6 or 8 times.

I've also been to school, a hotel hot tub, and a park. I like to stay where I am when I get drunk.

Drugs.

My specialty, though I've quit for now.

We'll start low, then go to the most hardcore ones. I only ask these questions out of what I've been told, I refuse to touch drugs. First, weed.

I got bored of it, but lets continue...

1. How much did you buy, and how much was it?

I've bought several times in the past. My first major pickup was a quarter ounce. 7.5 grams (though I think I may have been ripped off) for $60. Pretty standard pricing in Canada.

2. What was the taste like?

It's hard to describe. Very pungent and in-your-face the first time. I got used to it, and I actually still like the taste as much as I hate getting high.

3. How did you smoke it, and what did you look and smell like afterwards?

My first time was through a joint. Next few times was through a home-made pipe, which was the first time I got high. After that I stuck to a one-hitter. After trying a bong hoot I freaked out and got super paranoid.

I looked about the same afterward, but I felt a bit greasy. The smell didn't stick on me for too long, so I was fine to go home the next day with no suspicions from my dad.

4. What effect did it have? If you hurt yourself, what happened? If you watched something, how was it different?

The most notable for me at first was uncontrollable laughter and really heavy legs and weak knees. It felt like I was falling backwards sometimes. The stuff I smoked that was laced made my heart race, muscles spasm, and my hands and feet and mouth really numb.

Nothing really seemed all that different, I just happened to have a difficult time formulating a proper sentence. I couldn't coherently speak. A memorable quote from a friend while I was high was "You think you're being deep but you're just baked as shit". I was simply trying to tell him about how I was singing in rockband.

Oh, so you've tried ecstasy. Then you'll definitely be able to answer these questions.

Haha, it's been 2 years.

1. Where'd you get it?

One of my friends named Alex "has his sources".

2. How much was it?

$20 for a "double stacked" pill, which was probably just laced with meth anyway.

3. What was the design?

Looked just like any other pill. It had a line going across it. Nothing fancy.

4. How did it change the way you acted?

I just wanted to do things. Different things all the time. I wanted people I know to meet my friends that they already knew. I was unnaturally happy.

5. What did you really really want when you took it?

Sex. It made me horny as fuck.

6. What's it taste like?

Super fucking bitter, and it left my tongue raw where I let it sit while I grabbed a drink.


I'm know only a little about drugs, but only a druggie should be able to answer those questions.

I know about a lot more drugs than that. I've done shrooms and freebased caffeine. Crack Caffeine, so to speak.

And finally, the big one...

Sex.

lol

We'll start with the basis - the 'girl' you're dating.

Well to be fair I never really dated either of them. Just a drunken mistake, and I'm surprised how it's not awkward.

1. How long have you been dating?

N/A

2. What's her birthday?

Don't give a fuck.

3. What's her starsign?

Don't give a fuck.

4. Last name?

Evans

5. What point is she at in her cycle?

lol gross.

Oral sex. Only a couple of questions needed to establish this...
1. Which blowjob sent you through the roof (the really mind-blowing one)?

The only one, it was in her friend's parents bed.

2. What's pussy taste like?

Fuck if I know.

Finally, normal sex.
1. What's near the top of a vag, what's lower down, and where does the cawk go?

To be fair you'd learn more about this from a diagram than actual sex. There's a converging hole near the bottom (or top doggystyle). The clit is a bit above that, and try not to get a nasty squirt from anywhere else...

Underneath is the anus, and that's where the cawk goes (only joking).

2. What brand and size condom do you use, and how much are they?

Lifestyle, and I guess a normal size. They give them out for free near where I live. It's something everybody does once in a while as a joke, but actually having one on you is worth it.

3. If it was the girl's first time, what did you need? And what would she keep doing?

I doubt it was her first, seeing as she basically threw herself at me when she was drunk. I was a little drunk too.

4. And finally - how long did it take you to get off?

Being drunk, but also a horny idiot, around 10 minutes.

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Yeah, I don't lie on the internet because there's nothing to be gained from it. Might as well tell the truth so I can get the best advice and feedback possible.


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