At 6/12/08 11:52 PM, Dei-Sama wrote:
At 6/12/08 11:47 PM, Rideo wrote:
What should he make his decision on then, merely looks?There is in every one a beautiful soul. That is love .. it maybe is hard to find for some ?
You are attracted to people for their traits not a soul. There is the physical side, the intellectual side, and the emotional side. All of course are tied, original attraction is 99% of the time completely physical as you know nothing about this person since you haven't spoken with them before, but some physical features give you the instinct to learn more about this person to see if they fit in two your ideal candidate in the other to previously mentioned categories.
After the original attraction you develop the intellectual attraction (or in this case don't) from having conversations with the person, sharing ideas and jokes. Here comedy plays a large part for the male, if someone is very smart and therefore interesting but lacks a sense of humor and therefore utterly boring to be around then attraction might be lost, most people see wit as a sign of intelligence, so if you can interest a girl by saying smart things and still make her laugh you cover both sides of the intellectual attraction.
After this comes the emotional attraction, or more the emotional attachment. Humans easily become lonely so when they start spending most of their time in the presence of another they develop a need for this person, this is how relationships last beyond the point of where you've explored each others bodies completely and have little new ideas to exchange (little is a key word as an exchange of new ideas must be maintained or as in the same case as the OP any original intellectual attraction will break), the only reason you are still together is because you've become attached, you care about the other person and they keep you the closest of company.
So if someone cannot fill these three categories for ideal candidate for a mate for anyone they will be discarded. The End.