Church

[Onizero]

Guess what kids? You favorite atheist had to go to his black church so he could get back home! And I wrote everything down about it so I could tell YOU what happened. Originnaly when I was thinkin up this forum I was just gonna tell you the 3 things I heard in the beggining of the service that pissed me off, so I will adding the other AWESOME details.

1. "His [God] love has kept us from making foolish decisions." Does believing in Christ [cosmic jewish zombie] count?

2. "The devil has been tossing me and my mom around lately." How are you gonna blame a fake arch-celestial being for your problems in life. That's complete bullshit, so when you mess up on an exam your gonna blame the devil for it? I don't think so.

3. "He [devil] can't win against our prayers." He has followers to back him up just like you do.

Okay so that was the first now lets get to the details. So we had a inspirational song up in this hot as hell church (local crip members cut the wires to the air condition lol) because it was as hot (felt like a 100) outside. And in all seriousness I think the heat was getting to those people. They were shouting stuff like 'Oh jesus,' and 'lord hallelujah" for like 4 minutes until the brilliant (explained later) waited until she could speak. And then she said "The holy spirit is moving through this place today." At this point I couldn't believe how devoted they were to that false idol [jesus]. After they took offering toward the church we had another song and the responce was worst that the first.
After for at least five minutes, I heard clapping shouting and then a person said "Oh Jesus," in the perfect sex voice as if she was fucking him. Seriously I think they have chain reaction of fake orgasms because I heard a couple other people moaning saying "Jesus" and stuff.
Then we got to the preaching and she was talking about how attitude makes you live longer and she did a speech about giving examples with a few statistics, a prayer and Pinocchio ( wanting to be a real boy) to the point where I actually wanted to worship because she was basically telling the church members "Worship more, live longer!" and then she said "When the devil attacks your car he's attacking your joy." By attacking I think she meant stealing, and the last time I checked humans weren't devils... then she was like "I hope your all all are and are praying to god about the happiness he puts in your life." Fuck you, I put the things that make me happy in my life, not some celestial being. And then she told us a short story about a guy in a POV ( i think that's it) camp who lost hope and refused to eat and work and died a few weeks later. To ths she concluded negative attitude was the death of this guy. Then we wrapped it up and I left shop.
But in all seriousness I'm not going to church again because I don't want to be brainwashed...

Below I put the symbol of my former religion before i converted to atheism. You get 10 points if you answer correctly

[lolomfgisuck]

What's up with athiests? Every fucking day another one of you shitheads comes on NG and makes a post about how you've somehow physically gone out of your way to partake in a church activity and then bitched about the whole time as if you're somehow better then them or know something the rest of the world doesn't. Shut the fuck up already.

All this thread is going to do is start a huge pointless fight. You don't know God doesn't exist, they don't know that he does. It's all about "believing". And the fact is, fuck you... going to chuch and believing in God makes those people happy and if God doesn't exist then this is all we have and happyness is all that counts. Who are you to go around insulting them for doing seomthing they feel is neccessary part of their life to keep it enjoyable?

Just let the people that believe, believe in peace. If you don't like it, don't go... it's that simple. And if you're forced to go, then that's a personal problem and you should man up and deal with it by yourself until you become old enough to make your own decisions in life. If your parents want you to go to church and you hate it... tough shit. Out of respect, I think it's the least you could do since... you know... they did give you LIFE and everything.

What's wrong with people these days? Show some fucking respect , mind your own business, and let people be happy.

[iTzApricot]

lawl

[tomato-soup]

Unitarian Universalist?

[sonicx734]

At 6/9/08 11:51 AM, lolomfgisuck wrote: What's up with athiests? Every fucking day another one of you shitheads comes on NG and makes a post about how you've somehow physically gone out of your way to partake in a church activity and then bitched about the whole time as if you're somehow better then them or know something the rest of the world doesn't. Shut the fuck up already................<a nd more>

You can't say that for all atheists. I'm one of them and I just mind my own business, I don't interfere with religions.

[ThePretenders]

At 6/9/08 11:40 AM, Onizero wrote: You favorite atheist had to go to his black church

Good for you! I'm glad that you have left Christianity. Your ancestors were fooled into believing that they will have a better life after this one, so that the likelihood of them revolting would be slim.

[ILovezoms]

what to say, what to say,
1 Christainty for 10 points
2 You seem close minded just because Christainty is (ohh how i love to offend ) far fetched you should listen... to the message cept spare the rod spoil the child you know stuff like that that story bout the P.O.W is true the dick he could of lived but he decided to give up. you know just because i'm an atheist doesn't mean I cant listen to the message try to make a brain filter its what i did when I went to school, a Christian one, and Church just dont listen to preaching like "JESUS LOVE YA BABY SO YOU SHOULD LOVE HIM" and yes that is a direct quote from a revrand who came to my school.
3. dude what u got against blacks "I visited a black church" the Church doesnt encourage segration (any more)

[Onizero]

At 6/9/08 11:51 AM, lolomfgisuck wrote: What's up with athiests?

We don't believe in silly things

All this thread is going to do is start a huge pointless fight.

Well it didn't
:You don't know God doesn't exist,
Prove to me he does

[Aliensandwich]

Beliefs are beliefs, dumbass. Keep your adorable little teenage- rebel rants to yourself.

[Onizero]

At 6/9/08 08:13 PM, Aliensandwich wrote: Beliefs are beliefs, dumbass. Keep your adorable little teenage- rebel rants to yourself.

lol adorable?

[mushroomn]

Its people like the topic poster who give atheists a bad name, good job bad guy

[fawnret]

I am sereously tired of religeous threads. I am a Christian and I don't mind every one beleaving what they want, but why do people constantly just start complaning, bitching, or trying to prove their religeon to other people who don't want to change. I hate it when that happens especially on newgrounds which isn't a site to talk about this shit. NO ONE CARES!!

[Onizero]

At 6/9/08 08:30 PM, fawnret wrote: I am sereously tired of religeous threads. I am a Christian and I don't mind every one beleaving what they want, but why do people constantly just start complaning, bitching, or trying to prove their religeon to other people who don't want to change.

3 quarters of your post needed spell check 12 year old

[TheGimped]

At 6/9/08 11:40 AM, Onizero wrote: Guess what kids? You favorite atheist had to go to his black church so he could get back home!

Stopped reading right there. Damn atheists, shut the hell up already.

[rick8176]

A flamewar? Where the hell's my copypasta folder when I need it?

[MrNevada-tan]

I don't believe in any shitty religion, but come on, there's a superior being up there!!

[ZeroAsALimit]

At 6/9/08 08:52 PM, MrNevada-tan wrote: I don't believe in any shitty religion, but come on, there's a superior being up there!!

Your mum

[Anti-pie]

Fuck all Gods I am my own God.

[BFK]

I love how some churchfags toss around "god" and "devil" like life is a game of mario vs bowser, and your a toad and your enemies are goombas.

At least they are content in their ignorance and aren't bothering anyone, so maybe you should just let them be?

[subpar]

At 6/9/08 11:40 AM, Onizero wrote:

Below I put the symbol of my former religion before i converted to atheism. You get 10 points if you answer correctly

It looks like the symbol of the United Methodist Church. (I'm not sure how I knew that.)

By the way, I didn't read the rest of your post, because you don't seem to know what you're talking about. I'll listen to your criticisms of Christian belief when it's clear that you have, at the very least, a basic understanding of them.

[HentaiMasterSister]

Atheism really is just a choice if you don't believe in divine intervention or God. But glad you're back in believing.

[Tehpivot]

get ready to go to hell!

[uhnoesanoob]

LOL IM SO KEWL N ORIGINAL CUZ I LIEK DONT BELIEVE IN GOD N I MAKE OBSERVATIONS ABOUT PEOPLE WHO DO LOL.