For months now Uwe Boll has littered the internet with his bragging that his new movie Postal would open against Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. In fact we got so sick of it, we told him to go to hell. Now it looks like theater distributors are doing the same.
According to a statement issued in the wee hours of this morning by Boll's people, the movie's wide release next weekend has been cancelled. Instead of opening in 1500 theaters as planned, the film will now only open in 4 because United States distributors have decided to drop it. Uwe of course is calling this a boycott, saying: "Theatrical distributors are boycotting 'Postal' because of its political content," and he demands they give him a venue. He says, "We were prepared to open on 1500 screens all across America on May 23rd. Any multiplex in the U.S. should have space for us, but they're afraid."
I believe him when he says they're afraid, but I think it's far more likely that they're afraid of losing money. None of Uwe Boll's films has ever turned a profit, and for theater owners that means movies showing to empty houses. A sure way to theatrical bankruptcy.
Boll though, insists this is just another instance of everyone being out to get him. He continues, "We have even tried to buy a few screens in New York and Los Angeles, and they won't let us even rent the theaters! I urge independent exhibitors to contact us and book 'Postal'! Audiences have been expecting the film and I don't think exhibitors should censor what gets played in U.S. theaters." We'll have to take him at his word that they actually tried to buy screens, but since we don't know the circumstances of his rejection it's hard to know why they might have turned him down a guaranteed profit. Maybe the theaters in question simply didn't want to look bad. Or maybe they figured that even though he might be buying the screen, no one would show up to see it and they'd still lose money on concessions. Or maybe he's right, and everyone is out to get him because he's so controversial and brilliant. Personally, I'm inclined to believe the problem is simply that everyone is disinterested.