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Get arrested. You'll be protected from everything.

well sorry buddy. You should have chosen a long lasting condom. Like a $10 one. No one wants a 99c condom. So just dumb her and remember, USE A GOOD CONDOM!!!!!!!

I think i counted "Use a condom next time" about 30 times.

I'm pretty sure that before the internets was made people could deal with this sorta thing. Why dont you like... flee to mexico, change your identity and sneak back in, working in a sweatshop for 99c/hour?

Otherwise, if you cant be bothered and you're like what could possibly resemble a man, take the god damn responsibility, its not her fault she's preggers now, its your sperm's fault.

At 3/27/08 06:00 PM, djs111492 wrote:

At 3/26/08 07:53 PM, BuhddaVI wrote:

At 3/26/08 07:52 PM, steph2568 wrote: oh well.

u should've used a condom!

The thing is, is that I did.

But it broke. ;_:

Condoms don't break. Girls cut holes in them.

so she has a pair of scissors hidden in there? cunning...

well all i can say is your pretty fucked. Good luck friend.

A falcon punch should solve everything.

At 3/29/08 12:15 PM, beeryayghost wrote: A falcon punch should solve everything.

Even boxing!

At 3/29/08 07:25 AM, ZeroAsALimit wrote:

Even though you're lying, if you are old enough to have sex, you are old enough to face the consequences. You're a fucking moron and if you were telling the truth, I sincerly hope the child does not inherit your intelligence.

Or lack of said intelligence.

try toasting it in the oven then add a little sauce and salt. then sprinkle melted butter. if you want to finish eating the baby latter put it in the freezer then heat it in a microwave when you do want to finish it. Or just let it rot

Well...that's what happens when you have sex. =)

At 3/26/08 07:50 PM, BuhddaVI wrote: And she WANTS to keep the fucking baby.

Now I really want to kill the bitch, I tried explaining to her that it's not only her choice. But she refuses to listen.

I'm only 16, I'm not ready to have a child.

;_;

Hahah sucks to be you.

At 3/26/08 07:52 PM, Cubone wrote: and i rannn, i ran so far awayyyyyy.

couldnt get away.

Slow down this is slippin' through my mind,
This conversation has run out of time.
Honey I know you know what I mean,
And that's the one thing that you soon will find.

I know that you really wanna go,
My mind is runnin' outta gas just relax,
And recap, and relapse.
Tonight, my bodies jumpin' and I,
Go through the motions and I'm leaving on this journey,
Maybe someday I'll come running home to you.

I don't wanna see the day, my words cannot make it safe.
(Come running home! Come running home!)
Her heart in my hands, it's too bad, no regrets...
I don't wanna see the day, her tears are falling on my grave.
(Come running home! Come running home!)
This is my one chance to take back, no regrets...

Let's go! I just wanna let you know,
This situation leaves me outta breath.
We'll drive till the love that's in your eyes,
Drops to the ground and unravels like a thread...

I know that you really wanna go,
I only think about her, must get to her, cannot lose her.
You know that I will not let this die,
Life support systems and my mind on
Rewind and rewind and rewind...

I don't wanna see the day, my words cannot make it safe.
(Come running home! Come running home!)
Her heart in my hands, it's too bad, no regrets...
I don't wanna see the day, her tears are falling on my grave.
(Come running home! Come running home!)
This is my one chance to take back, no regrets...

I don't wanna see the day, my words cannot make it safe.
Her heart in my hands, it's too bad, no regrets...
I don't wanna see the day, her tears are falling on my grave.
This is my one chance (my one chance, my one chance)

Alcohol is bad for pregnancy
Everclear is 190 proof

Interprete that data how you will.

I've read every comment in this topic.

Hilarity at its highest.

Oh and by the way:

1.) Like many others before you said, if you aren't ready to have a child, you shouldn't have had sex. It really is as simple as that, but seeing as how she's already pregnant, that hardly helps now. You're going to have to stick around.

2.) Maybe you should be asking your family or a service for help and support, not NG. Most of the people here are 13-15 and virgins anyway. They're not going to have anything to tell you except Falcon Punch. Sure, for discussion and hilarity issues, this is the place to go. But if you're really seeking help, find someone you know can help you.

3.) What's up with the coat hanger? You realize that can actually kill your girlfriend too! If you're considering keeping the baby, go to a professional: someone that knows what they're doing. Don't try an at home thing, that can kill you girlfriend as well or at least make it where she can't have kids anymore. That's awful. The punching thing is just horrid too.

4.) This is your responsibility. Whether you are going to live up to it is up to you. But just think what's best for your child and stop being selfish!

Hope that helps.

Don't worry, your baby will be LOVELY!

Did you grow a pair and tell her parents yet?

If you are lying for attention, you got your wish, so tell everyone to stop, sadly I think you are telling the truth. Heres what i think.

Firstly, dont take any dumbfucks advice and hurt her, seriously, falcon punch, coathanger, whatever you people do it now, don't, anyone who thinks thats funny or will work, is dead wrong.

If the baby isnt very far along, say 4 months, talk to her about abortion, people think its wrong and religious losers threaten you about hell and murder, ignore those hypocrites, if they think abortion is killing, that would mean condoms, masterbation, birth control, any stopping of sperm to getting to a woman is killing because technically every sperm is a life.

If she doesn't want to have an abortion, consider adoption. I agree your not ready at 16, i dont think anyone has been or ever will be, or may think that they are but aren't.

Don't drug her or do anything to affect the baby, the only thing worse then having a kid at 16 (or 17, i dont know if ull have a bday before its born), is to have one with mental or physical problems, that will be worse.

Any kind of abortion is risky, but doing a backalley abortion, or a coat hanger or just hitting her, will not only probably kill the baby, but kill her aswell, or make her unable to have children, which will get you in a larger amount of trouble then imaginable.

Don't threaten your girlfriend about you killing her, if shes any smart she should goto the police and get help if ur gonna do any shit, and then ull be even more screwed.

Thats all I can offer other then me saying keep the child and raise it, which is bullshit from me because I have no idea what i would do in that situation.

Also, if you think your condom is going to break, dont use it, or make sure shes on the pill, or get a new condom and have anal sex if you have to have sex, but dont risk using a condom that could break when ur having vaginal intercourse, or try to pull out or anything like that, because that wont work.

God speed my friend, I hope you can get help or something.

pix or gtfo

At 3/29/08 02:24 PM, HomoeroticLoveChild wrote: pix or gtfo

You do realize that would be child pornography right? Thats illegal son.

I forgot to add some stuff.

If your not the father, don't ditch her, thats not cool, help her through the process and if she is going to keep it, then help her, you dont have to be the father unless you want to, but don't run away, thats not cool.

Newgrounds isnt the best place for advice.

Get your parents involved, no matter how embarrassing.

And finally, think long before you make any life altering decisions, not just with the baby thing, but about your whole life from now on.

I swear is have seen this thread before...

At 3/26/08 08:21 PM, NewGMan wrote: But this is why you really shouldn't have underage sex.

Honestly, people really can have underage sex and be responsible, I would know, I've done it. All it takes is a little responsibility.

Also, my girl is the pill.

At 3/29/08 02:26 PM, Allhaillaharl wrote:

At 3/29/08 02:24 PM, HomoeroticLoveChild wrote: pix or gtfo

You do realize that would be child pornography right? Thats illegal son.

i meant of her big belly, not her va-jay-jay fool.

unlucky

steal the baby and sell it to gypsies. Gypsies love babies....

hey look on the bright side st lest your not irish

you get ppl pregnant by looking at them

and its illeagle to get abortions

At 3/26/08 07:50 PM, BuhddaVI wrote:

I'm only 16, I'm not ready to have a child.

Have you learned to use condoms till your 18 now?

Hey man I'm somewhat dealing with a similiar problem .... except it's not me that got the girl pregnant. My brothers been dating this girl who's somewhat of a psycho bitch.
She missed her period got the test and it turns out shes pregnant. At first she was fine with just killing the thing and moving on with life so she tried taking a bunch of birth control at once but it didn't work. But then she talked to her sister and she convinced her to keep it. But my brother still didn't want to so she got pissed and decided to break up
this means she's going to keep it and he's going to be pinned with child support. There's no way this can happen so me and my brothers friends are going to try and plot a way to kill it ... any suggestions

At 3/29/08 12:42 PM, LilSMC wrote: try toasting it in the oven then add a little sauce and salt. then sprinkle melted butter. if you want to finish eating the baby latter put it in the freezer then heat it in a microwave when you do want to finish it. Or just let it rot

O_O......WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!!

At 3/26/08 07:50 PM, BuhddaVI wrote: And she WANTS to keep the fucking baby.

Now I really want to kill the bitch, I tried explaining to her that it's not only her choice. But she refuses to listen.

I'm only 16, I'm not ready to have a child.

;_;

No shit, Sherlock. Oh, and if you're asking Newgrounds for advice instead of your own parents, you're not ready to have kids until you're 40. 'Nuff said.

Double post :D

At 3/29/08 03:58 PM, Leo625 wrote: Hey man I'm somewhat dealing with a similiar problem .... except it's not me that got the girl pregnant. My brothers been dating this girl who's somewhat of a psycho bitch.
She missed her period got the test and it turns out shes pregnant. At first she was fine with just killing the thing and moving on with life so she tried taking a bunch of birth control at once but it didn't work. But then she talked to her sister and she convinced her to keep it. But my brother still didn't want to so she got pissed and decided to break up
this means she's going to keep it and he's going to be pinned with child support. There's no way this can happen so me and my brothers friends are going to try and plot a way to kill it ... any suggestions

Killing is bad, it's horrible, it's devistating, and it's unforgiveable. By the way, if you don't want a baby, DON'T HAVE SEX! F***ing some cute chick isn't worth scarring your life.