So, yesterday me and a few of my friends were heading through the plaza afterschool - just for some casual shopping. I had a bit of money saved up and thought I might just buy some new clothes or something. We looked through a few stores, my friends bought a few things but nothing really caught me eye. Eventually, we decided to call it quits and we all headed off our seperate ways. My house is on the other side of town, so it's faster for me too leave the opposite end of the plaza to my friends.
Anyway, I started walking from the west end of the plaza to the east, it was 20 to six and most the stores were closing. Just a few left open, so I thought I may aswell have one last look through before I left. I checked out some hobby shop, nothing there of interest, and just decided I'd had enough - but as I left the store something caught my eye. Across from the hobby shop, sitting in EB Games... the last copy of Super Mario Galaxy, just sitting there in all it's glory. I wanted it. I just had to have it. I quickly opened up my wallet, took out $100 in cash and ran my fastest across the plaza.
I made it into EB with 5 minutes til closing, the game was sitting on a shelf just 5 meters in front of me. I was about to reach forward and grab the game, when out of nowhere some kid walks past and snatches it before I had a chance. The kid was about 7 years old. He was pretty short and was wearing a white Pokemon T-shirt with Charizard on the front. The kid looked excited to get the last copy of Super Mario Galaxy, but I wasn't about to let that spoil my day. I lunged forward, grabbed the kid by his scrawny neck and began to pummel him in the face with my fist. Four, five, six punches. Blood from the kids face covered my shirt and trickled down my fist, but I continued punching. Twelve, thirteen, fourteen. Finally, I let go of the kid and he hit the ground. But I wasn't done there. I picked up a nearby Metroid Prime 3 display, a metal rod at the back was holding it up. I removed it and began to beat the kids bloody body with it. After a two minute frenzy of blood, flesh and broken bones I managed to calm myself down. I grabbed the kid by the throat and pulled him to his feet, then raised him over my head with both hands and threw him into the second hand game bin.
I managed to fight back my thoughts of rape as I turned to the counter and purchased the last copy of Super Mario Galaxy. Anyway, how do I unlock Luigi?
Don't worry. The kid had it coming. Trust me.
