m not too worried at this point. Surely, this man is not stupid enough to deny me entry. I explain that I was on the bus that just crashed. I describe the driver. I tell him the passengers on the bus could vouch for me too. I was truly surprised by his response.
"Either pay for a ticket, or walk."
Inside my head, a thousand tiny fans are disposing of a thousand tiny shits. I cannot believe what has just been said to me. Do they want me to pay for the fuck window that broke as well? I struggle to quell my rage, but I am not waiting an hour for another bus. I am going home. If that means paying for another ticket, then so be it.
I open my wallet. I know I have $5.60 in here somewhere.
Instead, I find 80 cents. Courtesy of the fuck vineyard.
I begin to argue with the man. I point up at the windows and tell him to ask someone on the bus to vouch for me. But he is having none of it. He waves to the bus driver, and the bus drives away.
I check my wallet for my keycard. Instead I find a note. It's from my sister.
"Needed card to go to DFO. Pay you back. xoxo."
I assess the situation. Now I understand the Wermacht's position. God's red army has blown apart my only method of transportation. I have .8 of a whole dollar in which to finance my retreat back to friendly territory.
I am so royally fuck'ed. Again.
I make a call. The familiar voice of my friend comes across the reciever. I explain to him what has happened.
"You are a walking inconvenience. Ok, I'm coming."
I love my friends. An hour later and we are driving in the direction of my house. Suddenly, my abdomen begins to pain. This isn't my normal movement pain. This pain feels warm, burning and sharp. I disregard it. My friend asks for his phone, and I turn on the car ceiling light to rifle through the glove box.
"Dude, I think you're bleeding."