you: How do you give out so many presents?
Santa: bored.com programmed me to say specific things in specific contexts.
you: Where do elves live?
Santa: All over the world.
you: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Santa: A whole forest.
you: People think you're a pedophile.
Santa: So you think I am a pedophile. What makes you think so? I am really a robot, you know.
you: You're a robot pedophile?
Santa: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No. I'm Santa. I give presents to kids.
you: So, you're a robot pedophile who gives presents to kids?
Santa: Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No. I'm Santa. I give presents to kids.
you: The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
Santa: Thanks for the info.
you: My cat has a huge scar on it's belly.
Santa: They have a mind of their own.
Santa: Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Santa: Are you serious?
Santa: What are you wearing?