Be like me motherfuckers!

[lolomfgisuck]

Wanna be like me, heres how:

1. Everybody that doesn't do everything just like you is doing it wrong. There are two ways to do everything, the lolomfgisuck way and the wrong way. Considering I'm better then you I must be doing everything right so everybody should do everything the way I do it. The logic here is flawless don't try to argue it.

2-A. Survival of the Fittest is natures way. Only the strong need to survive and only the strong should procreate. Unfortunitly mankind has gone over natures head and created this thing called 'society' that allows the weak and stupid to breed as well. To fix this issue we need to test the children. Every time you see a baby, pick it up and shake it violently. If it's neck breaks it's weak and doesn't deserve life. It also means that one (or both) of it's parents are weak as well... so they too must die.

2-B. You're not currently dead. Therefor, you must be strong. So stop acting like a pussy.

3. All non-human creatures are ignorant, ugly, and worthless. They're in your way shitting on your land and they need to be taken care of by any means neccessary.... immediatly.

4. Retards are not human. Neither are women. See rule 3.

5-A. You must eat at least one bullet for breakfast ever day to be considered manly. Me, I eat a whole clip.

5-B. Bullest may be exchanged for people in the rare occassion that one has an evil nemisis only if the people being eating for breakfast are similiar to that of the evil nemisis in question. That way, when confronted, you can honestly admit that you actually do eat people like him for breakfast.

5-B-1. Eating the cock head first makes you gay. So does playing with your food.

6. Curse words make your cock grow. I suggest using them as often as you fucking can. I curse so fucking much I had to have my fucking legs removed. Having your fucking cock broken in four fucking places before having robotic knees surgically implanted into your fucking dick hurts like a motherfucker... but is a neccessaity if one wishes to ever fucking walk again.

7. Period blood must give you a dimond cutting erection. Period blood is natures failed attempt at life. Drinking it is esentually the same thing as drinking souls. Souls give you power so I suggest you drink as many as you can as often as you can. (This rule applies to animals as well)

8. Getting laid makes you a boy. Fucking an eye socket makes you a man. Fucking an eye socket with the eye still in it makes you hungry. If the bitch is still alive when you're done... force her to make you a sandwhich. It's natures way.

9. Beer is for rednecks and homosexuals in denial. Nintendo is for children. And Anime is for virgins.

9-A. 2Pac is better then Biggie, Dre is better then Easy, and Death Row records is better then Bad Boy.

9-B. Coke is better then Pepsi. Gatorade is better then water. Mountain Dew is better then life.

9-C. Everything (including herpes) is better then Green Day. Except Korn. Korn are worse then Green Day.

10. Legos are better then Video Games. There is nothing wrong with video games but given the choice, a real man would rather build a castle. Anybody that builds a house with their legos is gay. Men own castles and conqure worlds. Homosexuals play house and pretend to get married.

10-A. Building a house out of Legos is acceptable if the house in question is either A) Going to be destroyed by huge chunks of random legos stuck together for the soul purpose of being chucked at a house or B) turns into a robot.

11. Authority figures are always wrong. Especially on the internet. No man allows himself to get pushed around by a nerd. Especially ugly ones that look like the male partner in a lesbian relationship taking place durring a face smashing ceremony to inaugurate the inviention of the 'ugly-brick'. (See Figure 1A)

11-A Authority Figures on the internet are always nerds. They'll deny it but it's true. No non-nerd would spend enough time on the internet to garner the respect needed to become a virtual authority figure. If the nerd in question claims to have friends... their friends are nerds too. That is, if they even exist.

12. There can be only one lolomfgisuck.

Figure 1A

[mastergurosp]

I didnt really read it I just glanced and then skipped to the bottom but I have noticed you have a lot of pride and self cofidence.

to much...

[Drift-And-Die]

At 7/27/07 06:00 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: All human creatures are ignorant, ugly, and worthless. They're in your way shitting on your land and they need to be taken care of by any means neccessary.... immediatly.

Fixed so you can be like me.

[AllmightyShan]

Copy and paste much?

[IndyKid500]

At 7/27/07 06:00 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: Wanna be like me, heres how:

This is where I stopped reading.

[Funkchiken]

At 7/27/07 06:00 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: 4. Retards are not human. Neither are women. See rule 3.

Damn straight

True men reproduce without women, through asexual means, such as budding.

[IrishLaddie]

Why? You say yourself that you suck.

[TheBasics]

At 7/27/07 06:00 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: 9-B. Coke is better then Pepsi.

This alone proves that all you say is true.

[lolomfgisuck]

At 7/27/07 06:05 PM, AllmightyShan wrote: Copy and paste much?

Are you fucking kidding me? How can I copy paste something about me? Are you making posts about me before I have a chance to make posts about me? Seriously... just because something is funny doesn't mean it's not original.

I tell you what, you show me where I copied this from and we'll call it a day... until, then suck my balls shit head.

[Sawke]

I was told drugs are bad.This confirms it.

[blamkitty]

Why the hell would i want to be a person who sucks?
If you say you're cool, I say you're a pool...of bullshit.

[TomatoGlock]

tl;dr

Someone sum it up?

[D3NTATUS]

I am going to follow these words of wisdom exactly, down to each and every period.

[weirdoo]

excuse me lolomfgisuck. But who the hell are you?

[Funkchiken]

At 7/27/07 06:13 PM, weirdoo wrote: excuse me lolomfgisuck. But who the hell are you?

who are YOU?!

I'VE NEVER SEEN YOUR FACE BEFORE 'ROUND THESE HERE FORUMS
we don't LIKE your kind 'round here

[ZeroScount]

At 7/27/07 06:06 PM, IndyKid500 wrote:

At 7/27/07 06:00 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: Wanna be like me, heres how:

This is where I stopped reading.

Same here..

[TurtleJuice]

At 7/27/07 06:10 PM, TomatoGlock wrote: tl;dr

Someone sum it up?

You're a faggot. This thread rules

[TurtleJuice]

Also happy 5000

[Tribal]

Why do you think anyone would wanna do all that, just to be like someone they don't wanna be like?

Too much spare time? Yeah, good point...

[Maus]

I happen to like being a nerd. :)

[DudeGoofyGuy]

You want us to get laid and kill women? There's only one way... and it means gay sex. >_<

[protege-moi]

You seem a little unfriendly. I don't think I want to be like you. Thanks for the pointers though!

[FourthHorsemanDeath]

Now, I'm not one to be a jerk, but why would I want to be like you, when I can be an original not conceited person who knows how to bathe is so much more fun!

[Ragenaric]

somehow, i feel safer after reading this

[FourthHorsemanDeath]

doesn't break some rules? Like being sexist, stupid, or extremely arrogant, and if it doesn't, I say we make a new rule that says posts like this are stupid and shouldn't allowed, no? Just me?

[Milesaway13]

At 7/27/07 06:07 PM, TheBasics wrote:

At 7/27/07 06:00 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: 9-B. Coke is better then Pepsi.

This alone proves that all you say is bullshit.

Fixed.

[TheAmateurAnimator]

At 7/27/07 06:00 PM, lolomfgisuck wrote: 10. Legos are better then Video Games. There is nothing wrong with video games but given the choice, a real man would rather build a castle. Anybody that builds a house with their legos is gay. Men own castles and conquer worlds. Homosexuals play house and pretend to get married.

Amen!

[thomtomw]

your ugly brick is broken.....its attacking the wrong people, she was already ugly.

[Kinspin]

Reading this shows me that I don't have to worry about death. Or trying to get with a woman.

[gostgamer]

a clip pussy a real man eats throwing knives.