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Masturbation Mistakes?

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Tribal
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-22 04:08:12

One time my bed sheets were covered with it... That wasn't a pleasent feeling when i was lying on it to sleep...

Wait... i don't masturbate!

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TeH-Lolipop-suckr
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-22 04:46:54

At 6/21/07 05:15 PM, M-to-the-C wrote:
At 6/21/07 05:31 AM, TeH-Lolipop-suckr wrote: well,one time, i had just had my nails done(painted too!) so i thought they were dry,so i go ahead and shove a finger up there...and when i was done...my front was all red!
-_-
Hey there

What?

mushroomkaiser
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 02:01:37

I'm not entirely sure why I'm airing out a piece of my dirty laundry but here goes...

One time I was taking a piss in the bathroom of my high school and this gay guy who liked me walked in and asked if he could masturbated be into the toilet, so I let him... my mistake was letting him dry hump me and bite my ear while he did it. (god that was a great third period)

I'm not gay by the way I'm just open to random sexual encounters, and no I won't cyber with you...

EvilPinkPig
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 02:32:35

It broke... =(

Scabe
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 02:49:15

I got some on the front of my shirt and didn't realize it was there until i went out in public...
Luckily I just got a new shirt and was able to change quickly.


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j3554
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 03:34:11

At 6/18/07 05:26 PM, Ronald-McDonald-LoL wrote: I remember the time I did it in the bathtub, using the soap. It felt great, but the next time I tried it I got soap down in the hole... It stung so bad and I had to get it out by spraying the showerhead in it.

I have made this mistake too while in the shower. It very quickly turned into a terrible mistake though. My "hole" is considerably more accessible to soap than yours. o.O

Wyvern-Knight
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 03:49:57

1) i masturbated hella fast,i had cum all over my shirt
2) i got soap into my dick,it hurted like a week when i tried to pee
3) once my dick was too dry,i masturbated and some of my dick's skin was gone(aww thats the worst)


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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 04:02:06

At 6/18/07 09:07 PM, Invincible-fang01 wrote: Also this one time I turned myself upside-down and squirted my face to see what that was like.

Haha, i did this as well, it sucked.


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dennie
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 04:33:21

At 6/18/07 05:33 PM, Hellian00 wrote: I once did it in the shower using hair cinditioner as lube. I slipped off and hit myself in the eye.

lol, fucking amazing

o14v
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 04:50:00

At 6/18/07 05:21 PM, itsflemz wrote: I pulled too hard and snapped my banjo sting (the connector to the foreskin bit)

Ouch!

Fremen
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 04:58:22

At 6/18/07 05:09 PM, LivinInTheSunlight wrote: When I was 11, I thought that if I licked my hand, and masturbated, it would feel like a blowjob. I was tragically mistaken.

1) That is pretty early to masturbate.
2) You are fucking messed up.

What mistakes did/have you make/made?

1) Too much.
2) TOo hard.
3) Doing it right now and telling everyone.


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KingCommunist
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 05:03:46

At 6/18/07 05:11 PM, Schizo-Sephy wrote: One time... It went into my face......

..same

PyroGreg
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 05:18:22

At 6/18/07 05:37 PM, numbers wrote:
At 6/18/07 05:32 PM, Ronald-McDonald-LoL wrote: Cum is messy
Not if you masterbate 3 times a day, straightggot.

It's hard to get more than 3 inches of cum >:(

AND IT'S HARD NOT TO MASTERBATE EVERY FUCKING DAY,.

Lol I can go a week without masterbating

rithel
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 05:18:23

At 6/21/07 05:31 AM, TeH-Lolipop-suckr wrote: well,one time, i had just had my nails done(painted too!) so i thought they were dry,so i go ahead and shove a finger up there...and when i was done...my front was all red!
-_-

man ,that's hot...


Already Disturbed.

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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 05:20:14

At 6/18/07 05:09 PM, LivinInTheSunlight wrote: Title says it all, did you ever make a mistake while masturbating, while a kid or otherwise?

When I was 11, I thought that if I licked my hand, and masturbated, it would feel like a blowjob. I was tragically mistaken.

What mistakes did/have you make/made?

ME TO! I also ejaculated into my mouth... missfire...

Reaper-117
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 11:42:33

At 6/19/07 10:40 PM, Niyou77 wrote: One time, like 20 years ago, when I was 13, I jacked off, and right at my climax, my mom walked in and I came on her. It was teh lulz.

Wow O__o
I actually fell of my chair on this one RoFlMaO
My worst mistake was NOT jerkin off for like 2 weeks and when I finally gave in and came, my Spemies hit me all over my face, in the mouth, nose, and my fukin eye.
Smelled and tasted vry salty XD

-Lesson learned: No masturbation for a long time = ur cum comin out like a bullet, Dont be like me and unexpectedly hit urself or a loved one XD

jabba-the-but
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 13:40:38

ONCE I WAS JACKING OFF WITH MY GIRL FRIEND SHE NEVER WANTS ME TO CUM ON HER SO AS I CAME I PUT MY HAND OVER MY WANG TO CATCH IT BUT INSTAD IT HIT MY HAND AND SPLATTERED IN MY EYE AND IN MY MOUTH THAT WAS EMBARRISING

oldbinny
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 14:09:15

Well, I was jerking off, and I accidently snapped my cock off. God, It felt good.

mastermalpass
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 15:11:49

Once I had my tissue out ready, but I tensed and cum got launched over the tissue and onto my hand and floor.

Another time was when I nearly came but didn't want to finish at the time (in case there was better porn to be seen) Come ran down my cock and all over my hand.

This is why I always have a tissue ready.

mastermalpass
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 15:16:26

(can't find an edit button for my posts)

Say has anyone here masturbated so many times in one day you run out of sperm and have to wait for a day to regenerate some?

LivinInTheSunlight
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-25 15:27:46

At 6/25/07 03:16 PM, mastermalpass wrote: (can't find an edit button for my posts)

There is no edit button.

Also, still in shock that I made an epic thread.


I've lived in filth, I've lived in sin
And I still smell cleaner than the shit you're in

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PhantomBPR
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-26 15:58:39

Skeet on the bedsheets.

NeonFlame126
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-26 18:11:33

Once, before I could...I tried for too long in the shower and it turned purple ='(.


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deafeningsilence5
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-26 18:12:23

Not enough lube = little sore spots on yer wiener.


XBL: Foar The Lulz
>:(

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IrishLaddie
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-26 18:51:23

Use olive oil as a lube, it fucking rocks.

B1LlYPL6C380
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-27 04:42:35

lol I thought that to ! but besides from the licking hand thing Ive never made any mistakes.


These Are Not The Droids You Are Looking For.

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do-or-die1
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-27 04:43:39

At 6/26/07 06:51 PM, IrishLaddie wrote: Use olive oil as a lube, it fucking rocks.

My penis smelled like fucking olive oil for 3 days man, don't do that.


"Just remember, if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off"

Za boobiddy boobiddy doo!

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mastermalpass
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-29 16:04:07

At 6/27/07 04:43 AM, do-or-die1 wrote:
At 6/26/07 06:51 PM, IrishLaddie wrote: Use olive oil as a lube, it fucking rocks.
My penis smelled like fucking olive oil for 3 days man, don't do that.

That's quite funny to imagine.

I hate it when you nearly have an orgasm, but you hold yourself back incase there's better porn... But you've already had a half orgy, so you can't really get a full one in the end.

CartoonDiablo
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-29 16:08:33

Did it like 5 times in one day and my cock and balls hurt like hell.


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CapnCrunchDaPimp
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Response to Masturbation Mistakes? 2007-06-29 16:09:20

Wacking off with soft cock

( I AM ASHAMED, I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS SOFT UNTIL MY PENIS WAS HUGE RED AND SWOLLEN