*I wake up in bed with Sal next to me*
Oh, thank the Emperor! it was just a dream...
*Sal also wakes up and hands me a shotgun*
Hun, you'd better check on the fridge and bathroom, there's still some puppies and bugs there. And no, it was not a dream. Wait till I get my hands on those Space Marines! I'll kick their asses!
*I get out of bed, put on a coat and fuzzy slippers and head for the bathroom first. From inside comes a gnawing and squishy sound. I rack the slide of the shotgun and open the door*
Gross, this is just sickening...
*The suposed hooker that never showed up lies dead in the tub with a gaunt gnawing at her intestines. i aim and blow the head clean off.*
Well, shit! 'Nid blood is always such a bitch to clean...
*I pump the shotgun again and head for the kitchen. In the living room it's a real mess with puke and empty bottles everywhere. They even smashed up a window. In the kitchen lie two wolves, both fast asleep, they must have been drinking too...*
I wonder how much these two are worth at the zoo? Better tie them up before they start chewing at the furniture.
*As I tie them up I notice a yellow sticky note on the fridge, on it a message written in barely readable handwriting. Who ever wrote this was pissdrunk.*
We got fined for discharging firearms in a non-combat, non-holiday situation. So n e way we pooled together, could u spare $175.58?
P.S. if a girl comes by asking about stripper gig, get my money back an tell her to piss off cuz she's REALY late.thx
Son of a bitch motherf*cker! They are so dead!
*Sal enters the room in her undies with a blooded purse and a handfull of money*
Well, I can hear that you read the note. But no worries, the bitch in the tub carried alot of money. That should be more then enough to cover the expenses they made. Hey! Are those real Fenrisian Wolves!
*Sal looks at the two sleeping wolves, pads over to one and pats it on the head. The wolf wakes up and sways its head back and forth. big hang over.*
They are soo fluffy!
*I can already feel where this is getting at...*
I've been thinking about sending these two to a zoo, that way we can make some money out of them.
*Sal pets the wolf some more and looks up with a smile*
Screw the zoo! We're gonna make coats out of them!