Smurf Sex.

[Bunnyreaper]

Smurfette awoke in her bed.

Alone.

It had been several weeks since she had a decent fuck. After the funeral of Papa smurf no other smurf seemed to have the sexual energy anymore. All except for Smurfette, who couldn’t stop thinking about that rotting corpse. All those maggots sliding in and out of every orifice and that sweet smell of Smurf decomposition, just made her go all buttery in the nether regions.

The thought was too much, she lay back down on her bed and started to massage her breasts, pinching the nipples ever so slightly, imagining the cold stiff body off Papa smurf, lying in his coffin. She explored her body with her hands, squeezing and stroking as she moved down towards her glistening cunt.

Slowly she separated the lips and roughly inserted two fingers in and out, again and again, her juices dripped down her fingers, and she brought her hand to her mouth, tasted herself, “Just like Smurfberries.” She exclaimed and reached under her bed for her Smurfin sex stick.

She thought again to her first sexual encounter, one night after a fun day out picking flowers and planting opium (it paid more than wheat) she snuggled up to her Smurfbear and drifted off to dreamland with all the other Smurfs went whilst they slept until BANG! She was awoken by her door being kicked down.

Three Smurfs entered; generic Smurf #5, generic smurf #12 and Handy Smurf. The two generic Smurfs went in and held her down whilst Handy, in his accentuated Smurfy voice, said in a calm tone “Well Smurfette, it seems that you still have that pesky hymen. I’ll be glad to remove it for you.” She had screamed, as would most ten year olds in this position but was silenced by the two generic Smurfs who brought forth a gag and three pairs of handcuffs.

After securing her to her own bed, with her legs spread eagle and her hands secure to the bedpost and gagging her sufficiently until the screaming was muffled to a low hum, Handy took out his handmade strap-on, not having any penis of his own, and instantly Smurfette’s eyes focused on the device, (imagine three cucumbers cello taped together and attached to a small blue mans crotch, eye catching no?) fear exhumed her and she began to struggle against her bonds.

Handy laughed at her pitiful attempt at escape, “You can struggle all you like petal, your virginity is mine!” With that he plunged his makeshift cock deep into Smurfette, her hymen broken instantaneously, brought all the way out and plunged all the way in once more, again and again Handy pounded her now gaping gash and with each outward thrust bringing out more an more blood and mucus and with each inward thrust Smurfette screamed against the gag.

He stopped after she passed out, seeing it as pointless without the screaming, untied her limp body and slapped her until she awoke. He whispered in her ear “Now, my dear, you have a choice. You can either let me take your anal virginity with old Smurfer here, or you can clean up this mess you’ve made.” Smurfette looked on her floor and saw the many puddles of her mucus and blood, she then turned to “Old Smurfer” and didn’t see any choice. “I… I’ll clean the mess” Smurfette whimpered and crawled towards the kitchen. “No, no, no Miss Smurfette, with your tongue, you shall clean this floor like the Smurfing slutfuck that you are.” She turned around to the mess and went down on all fours exposing her arse. Generic Smurf #5 kicked her and told her to get on with it and so she did, licking up her blood and mucus with her arse sticking up in the air.

Generic Smurf #12 had had enough of this and unbridled his Smurftastic penis and shoved it up her tight virgin arsehole, Smurfette screamed and stopped licking. Handy caught her and spoke in a stern tone “Now Miss if you don’t continue licking up all your nasty juices ““Old Smurfer”” will have to make your stools looser and I don’t think you want to clean up that.” Smurfette shook her head and continued to lick up her mucus and blood wincing at the continuous pounding that generic smurf #12 provided for her hole and moaning at each given situation.

“Good times” Smurfette said and began to insert her Smurfin sex stick deep into her loose fadge, its ribbed goodness bringing sexual relief. Her thoughts returned to the decaying corpse of Papa Smurf and she pushed her sex stick deep into herself, out again and back at a faster pace. She cries out in joy as the stick brushes her clit, moans loudly and with her right hand begins to pinch her nipples harder and harder and harder until… nothing. No orgasm. No cumming. No nothing. She needed dead mans cock.

She crept out of her mushroom home and slowly made her way to the burial grounds of her fellow Smurfs, shovel in hand, ready to be reunited with the corpse that will fulfil her ever growing hunger for cock.

The trees growled softly, the wind rustled the leaves and Smurfette arrived at the grave of Papa Smurf. She closed her eyes and sunk her shovel into the brown earth and began her grave robbery.

Thud.

She had reached the coffin.

Using the shovel she pried off the lid releasing a bright white light that consumed her body, knocking her unconscious.

She awoke next to the coffin. It was empty. Papa Smurfs body had been placed elsewhere to ensure that it was not to be defiled. In its place was a seven foot long magic tiger with an interchangeable penis that could be any length.

Now, a smurf is quite small, so a seven foot long tiger, in comparison, is very large indeed, not to mention its erect penis, which spanned the distance of 12 inches give or take at the beginning of the encounter, so you would think that Smurfette was shitting herself, which she was, but she was also becoming aroused at the sight of this monstrous beasts prick and the scent of her own faeces.

[Bunnyreaper]

The tiger pounced and pinned Smurfette down with a single paw, spreading her legs with ease and making his penis smaller, small enough to enter Smurfette. She cried out “What the Smurfin fuck are you Smurfin in the fuck?!” Not caring about being literate. He ignored and mounted her and began to hump away like the animal it was, screaming in its tiger voice. Smurfette felt this monsters cock slide deep into her vagina, harder and faster then anything she had ever felt, she moaned loudly as with each thrust the tigers penis grew in size yet it was still humping away. She split and screamed in pain, her blood spurting out onto her naked flesh.

The tiger saw the blood and hungrily lapped it up still humping away, growing in size, splitting Smurfette in two steadily, and tearing at the seams. Smurfette continued to scream in agony as her blood spurted over her body, on her face, onto her breasts, she spasmed constantly in intense orgasm, no longer able to distinguish pleasure from pain.

Suddenly the tiger bit down on her right breast, ripping it off and swallowing it whole, his penis growing in size, splitting her stomach open, spilling her intestine, liver and kidneys all for show bringing a climax to Smurfette’s pleasure/pain.

What a fuck. ^_^

[AarghCat]

Buddy, you need therapy. Forever.

[Who-Is]

I just beat off in the middle of my workplace reading that.

[Sir-Fobos]

i have just lost what i had left of humanity

[The-Reaper]

At 11/15/06 05:39 PM, NekopanClock wrote: Buddy, you need therapy. Forever.

Agreed.

[Fire]

Rule 34 lives on.

[lolswords]

What....The...Fuck

[UnicornExplosion]

If you beat off to that you need therapy...

[CUBErt]

Awesome.

I rarely do one line posts, so this is knd of why I'm still babbling.
So you see, the fact that I am ramblig on, I am not breaking any rules, except the "Stay on Topic" one. Sorry about that.
I'll stop now.

[JimmyWorld]

wow good story

[Who-Is]

You guys are pussies... this is the best post I've ever read. Seriously, I have a raging boner right now and I'm stroking my cock thinking about what it must feel like to be burried deep inside the tight anal caviety of a smurf against her will...

I'd love to disembowl her, remove here intestines and beat off with the end of her intenstinal tube.

[CybeastGregar]

At 11/15/06 05:44 PM, Mr-Butterfingers wrote:

At 11/15/06 05:39 PM, NekopanClock wrote: Buddy, you need therapy. Forever.

Agreed.

seconded..ALOT!!!

[AarghCat]

At 11/15/06 05:51 PM, Who-Is wrote: I'd love to disembowl her, remove here intestines and beat off with the end of her intenstinal tube.

You need therapy. In Hell.

[Peter-II]

Dude, you rule.

[Bunnyreaper]

At 11/15/06 05:54 PM, NekopanClock wrote:

You need therapy. In Hell.

What therapist in Hell would satisfy me as well as Smurfette?

[Rayth]

dude... just... no.

[SirLebowski]

This entire thread is invalid, if any of you have ever seen Donnie Darko you would know Smurfs are asexual.

[Complete]

Lmao.

Good job.

[SenorPresidente]

hawt

[Fap-Attack]

Bad memories............ Bad memories.................

[c-dog11]

o...k..? that was extrange and i agree with them you need therapy,but far away from us

[Bunnyreaper]

At 11/15/06 06:13 PM, SirLebowski wrote: This entire thread is invalid, if any of you have ever seen Donnie Darko you would know Smurfs are asexual.

They also have magical properties.

[Slapdamonkeyaz]

...My childhood has been killed, again. Just... god...

twitch twitch

[Blingmaster2193]

it started weird but i was hopeful it would get better... but it just got worse and worse...

[Idiosyncratic]

Were you abused as a child? If so, then this product is just for you. Ever wondered why you have sexual fantasies about smurfs? Now, HERE'S YOUR ANSWER. SEXUAL ABUSE. Now you get to play the sexual abuse card for all of your problems. Example:

You: I like to kill things
Person: Why, YOU SICKO
You: I was sexually abused as a child
Person: Oh that excuses everything

See, this could be yours free for five easy payments of $19.99. You heard me, only $19.99. You WILL get satisfaction, and if not, then you'll get your money back, NO HASSLE

note, not intended for those under the age of 5, and those with heart problems should consult a doctor before using this product. For U.S citizens only.

[kLyy]

At 11/15/06 05:46 PM, Rape-Wizard wrote: What....The...Fuck

234 views
27 replies

Creepy. . . . .

[fli]

I read that at least twice...
OMG--

It's more hilarious on the second time...
I prey thee, more...

[Bunnyreaper]

At 11/15/06 06:25 PM, Idiosyncratic wrote: Were you abused as a child? If so, then this product is just for you. Ever wondered why you have sexual fantasies about smurfs? Now, HERE'S YOUR ANSWER. SEXUAL ABUSE. Now you get to play the sexual abuse card for all of your problems. Example:
You: I like to kill things
Person: Why, YOU SICKO
You: I was sexually abused as a child
Person: Oh that excuses everything

Etc.

Slicing off my penis, shoving it up my asshole and winking at me was all you had to do.

[donkeychum]

that was awkward, but it gave me a hard-on.

adn you made me lose my hard on. You're going to pay for that. -Tankman