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Posted at: 8/25/06 03:47 AM
Sign-Up: 04/17/03
Posts: 12,748
There is a cricket in this house. That chirping bastard will not allow me to sleep. He is a crafty one, hiding his location with that chirp formulated to come from everwhere and deny you the ability to rest and gain focus. Think about it. The cricket is one of the few creatures in nature more powerful in the human enviroment than its own. In your home a bear would still be a bear but he would have trouble with doorways. I'm assuming a bear dumb enough to enter a house would be male. A wolf could come in but you could lead him with treats and box him up in a room untill he was distracted by your dogs squeeky toys and forgot all bloodlust. A bat you could hit with a broom. But the cricket is next to impossible to locate visually or sonically. The second lights go on their noises stop. They toy with you. He's making you fight on his terms, getting in your head. And then when you do you have to have worked stunts on the matrix to actually hit the things. I haven't determined the mission yet but I think the KGB might have had something to do with the development of crickets. Did I meantion it's keeping me awake?
I have nothing against people who can use pot and lead a productive life. It's these sanctimonius hippies that make me wish I was a riot cop in the 60's
Posted at: 8/25/06 03:50 AM
Sign-Up: 11/27/05
Posts: 1,361
But the problem is that it can't kill you. Give him venomous fangs, and that's a beast.
Sign-Up: 09/17/03
Posts: 3,943
I went up to Oregon and heard ZERO crickets while I was up there, down here in cali you'll hear hundreds all going at the same time, you learn to tune them out. however, when you have the windows all closed up and there's just ONE inside your house, that fucker will drive you nuts.
g'luck finding the lil bastard.
Posted at: 8/25/06 03:53 AM
Sign-Up: 10/17/03
Posts: 10,591
At 8/25/06 03:50 AM, CalmLikeABomb74 wrote: But the problem is that it can't kill you. Give him venomous fangs, and that's a beast.
True, but it can still deprive you of sleep until you're virtually nuetralized. So basically it can slowly torture you to a near-death outcome.
I'd say get earplugs.
"In the house with the laughing windows, we're spilling blood like a cheap innuendo." Writer - Mountain Dew Addict - StarF68
Sign-Up: 12/31/02
Posts: 21,226
Just buy a damn gecko. It'll stop the chirping fo sho.
Sign-Up: 04/26/06
Posts: 1,653
Gas your whole house.
Posted at: 8/25/06 03:58 AM
At 8/25/06 03:53 AM, HeinousDude wrote: Just buy a damn gecko. It'll stop the chirping fo sho.
The geckos are in on it. When you're exausted you'll beleive anything that's said about car insurance.
Posted at: 8/25/06 03:59 AM
Sign-Up: 04/08/03
Posts: 5,476
Leave a small lamp on if it shuts him up. If you're that tired you won't be bothered by a little bit of light.
No more fucking moving .gifs? WHAT THE HELL. FUCK YOU.
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