My mom is worrying me (thus the title) and I just need to vent for a bit. If you read the whole damn thing, thanks. If not, it's not like I care.
We moved to this town called Sheboygan in 97. My parents broke up in 92 and my mom had just finished nursing school. She got a job offer here and decided to take it since her sister, Eva (my aunt) lives nearby. So, my mom and I came here.
Around 2000 my mom developed some sort of problem. There was something wrong with her arm where it didn't work like it should have and she had pain in her neck. It lasted for a month or two and she went back to work.
Then, I want to say sometime around 02, it came back. My mom had to have two disks in her neck replaced. She's been slowly getting better since then.
Then, in late 04, she had a bad stint with her diabetes. For those who don't know, diabetes is where your thyroid stops producing insulin. Insulin is what keeps your blood sugar levels stable. Anyway, one way or another, it got high. And over the corse of a week, my mother got really bad. She wasn't eating, she wasn't taking her insulin and she wasn't drinking and she wasn't making it to the bathroom.
I knew something was wrong, but my mother kept telling me she was fine and not to call anut Eva. Finally she relented and I called my aunt and my mom was taken to the hospital. Her blood sugar was high. 800+. Let me put this lightly. People have gone into comas and died at 600. And I won't lie, that's a hard thing for a 13yr old to have on his head. Since then, she hasn't been the same.
Last march was the most recent incident. There was an ice storm and mom was headed off to work. I went to bed early assuming my mom would wake me up to scrape the ice off the car. She didn't.
She scraped off half the car and pulled into the street to get the other half. Inbetween the car and curb, she slipped on the ice and broke her hip. She was there until someone found her twenty minutes later. Keep in mind, it was dark, and the freezing rain was still coming down.
So, she couldn't stay in the hospital, and nursing homes were too expensive, so we decided it would be best for her to stay with my aunt Eva and uncle James. So that ment, I got to stay home, by myself, for two months.
Those were the two greatest months of my life. I won't lie. I had a lot of fun in my mom's absence. I spent a lot of time on NG and I played videogames to my heart's content. But, that's besides the point of this post.
She's back at home now. She went back to work, for two days and stopped. She's not good enough to go back yet.
This, I suppose is the point of the post. She has trouble walking. To go up or down a step, like a curb, she needs to hold on to my arm. I also have to do just about everything for her. She's been complaining about her legs. As anyone who knows a bit about diabetes knows, diabetics often have leg problems. She told me that the nerves in her legs are damaged and that she feels a constant burning every waking moment. She also said that there's no way for it to get better, nor will she be able to walk better. Ever.
And, she said today, that she may need to go on disability. IS THAT ANY WAY FOR A 46 YEAR OLD WOMAN AND HER 15 YEAR OLD SON TO LIVE?
One more thing to vent about.
She said to me one night as I was trying to fall asleep.
"Anthony. If I die, it's ok. When you die you don't feel pain anymore."
WHAT THE HELL KIND OF THING IS THAT TO SAY TO YOUR 15 YEAR OLD SON.
What do I do?
Help.